Here Comes A Cold
by iS2.coheed.and.cambria
Summary: Sam goes out in a blizzard after Dean and him have a fight. After he meets a group of guys who want to do more to him than beathim up he realizes his nightmare is only beginning. HurtColdConfusedAbused Sam, Protective Dean. Warning Adult themes
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Here Comes a Cold

**Author: **T (For adult themes and language)

**Summary: **Sam goes out into a blizzard to get food after Dean and him have a fight. After Sam meets a group of guys who want to do more to him than beat him up he realizes his nightmare is only beginning. Really an excuse for hurt, confused, frozen and scared Sammy with plenty of protective Dean. Beware- adult themes.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ANYTHING that has to do with supernatural!

**A/N:** Alright I've had this idea in the back of my head for a while now and I finally managed to put it out and actually write it. Please review and let me know what you all think

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"Sam stop complaining."

That was probably the fifth time Dean had said those three words in the duration of the day.

Sam, stop complaining.

"Well Dean, come on." Sam said trying to reason with his older brother.

A firm hand slammed down on the table they were sitting at and Dean shouted, "Come on, _what_? "

Sam rolled his eyes, "This town. This room." Sam's eyes were wide and he shook his head waiting for Dean to agree.

Dean just shrugged, "What about them?"

Sam shook his head, "It's like these people keep track of everyone who comes in and out."

"Suck it up Sammy."

Sam laughed, "Suck it up? A five year old tripped me and told me to get the hell out of her face!"

Dean chuckled, "Well maybe next time you should watch where those big foot feet are going. It's a small town that's been through a lot, what do you expect?"

Sam and Dean were in this small town taking care of a spirit that had already killed two people. The spirit was haunting an old alleyway, and when young female brunets walked through it, they were murdered. Or that was the theory.

Sam looked out the window, "Yeah maybe, but Dean. This room is ridiculous." Sam turned around and threw his hands in the direction of the single bed in the middle of the room to the room.

"Would you rather sleep in the car? It's all we could afford!" Dean yelled getting up and pacing the room, "I already told you, we go where the job takes us and if it takes us to a crappy motel room, that's where we go!"

"But Dean come one, we could have gotten a better ro-"

Dean threw his hands in the air and dug his hand into his pocket, "Yeah? Why don't you go get us a better room? Take it!" he yelled throwing a five dollar bill at Sam's chest, "That's all I have, show me your goddamn money!"

Sam bent over and picked the five dollars up from the floor, "Sorry."

"Show me your money!" Dean yelled walking up to Sam's face. He reached down in to Sam's pocket and he swatted him away. Dean reached again and pulled out Sam's wallet. The younger brother look down ashamed as Dean opened the wallet to reveal 0 dollars, "That's right you don't have any money either. I just spent my last 35 dollars getting us this room for one night. The money I fucking earned. Show me the money _you _earned."

Sam said nothing just continued to stare at the ground.

"That's right. So much for a fucking college education. I may not have gone to collage but I do the best I can. And if the best I can do is this motel room, you better appreciate it or get something better." Dean yelled into Sam's face.

Dean walked away from Sam and knew he wasn't going to dare say anything back. Dean was close to hitting him, close to loosing his patience with his ungrateful brother.

"Just take that and go get us something to eat, I saw a McDonald's a few blocks down past that park…" Dean whispered sitting back down at the table.

Sam nodded and said, "Where are the keys."

Dean laughed, "No you don't get to use _my _car. I want you to see where you'd be without me."

Sam looked out the window. It was a cold January night and the last report Sam had seen on TV was that there was supposed to be a blizzard. That's how this whole fight had started. First with the weather being too bad to do this hunt. Then with the town the hunt was in. Then with the room they managed to get. And here they were, two days later and they were still where they started.

The snow right now was nowhere near the scale of a blizzard, but it was getting there.

Sam couldn't help but shake his head at Dean's last comment, "I'd be back in Stanford, that's where I'd be." He whispered under his breath.

"What's that?" Dean said loudly.

"Nothing." With that Sam threw open the door and slammed it behind him.

He made his way down two flights of stairs and looked out the window of the door before stepping out. Maybe he should have asked Dean for the keys again.

When Sam opened the door a gust of icy wind blew in, nearly knocking him off his feet. It was too cold to be walking around outside with only a long sleeve shirt and coat on. Sam stepped out slowly and took note that the snow was already about ten inches deep. Maybe the blizzard was closer than Sam thought.

Sam shivered under his clothes and took a few regrettable steps forward. This was going to be a long walk to get a few things from the dollar menu.

After walking a few blocks Sam started to feel the cold getting the better of him. His legs felt numb and it was a miracle he was still able to move one foot in front of the other. Sam was across the street from the park Dean had mentioned and through the snow filled air he spotted a bench.

Once Sam was across the street he quickly got over to the bench and sat down for a second. Normally he would brush the snow from the seat, but he was so covered in snow it didn't even matter anymore.

Once he was settled into the bench and relaxed he realized that this was a waste of time.

"Two more minutes and I'll keep going." He said to himself and let his eyes close a little.

"Hey! Who's this guy?" Sam heard someone shout. His eyes shot open and grew wide. He was surrounded by six guys. Six guys who looked like they could eat him.

But Sam had learned from experience half the people who looked like that were only good for one punch. Sam could only hope that was the case this time.

"Look, I w-was j-just-" Sam began but was cut off by a strong punch in the stomach.

All the guys around laughed at Sam's expense. He didn't mean to stutter, but he was so cold that's just the way his voice came out.

Sam held his stomach protectively and quickly fought back sending a punch to the man's jaw.

The other five immediately reacted and came running towards Sam fists flying. He tried his best to defend himself but his body was stiff from the cold that he was not used to. The punches rained down on him and for the most part there was nothing he could do. He felt himself crumbling to the ground and once he was on the floor completely he felt the kicks coming to his stomach. He gagged and tried to keep the contents of his stomach where it was meant to be, but he felt his break coming.

"Stop!"

All the punches and kicks stopped even though the pain did not and Sam looked up to see another guy approaching who seems to carry himself as the leader.

Sam spat out a combination of blood and bile on the snow and coughed a few times. He twisted himself out of the fetal position he was in, in an attempt to protect himself and laid flat on his stomach. He made a futile attempt to push himself up from the floor but just fell right back down.

A few people laughed at his attempt and Sam felt his hatred for these people growing by the second. Were they going to kill him?

"What's your name?" the leader yelled down at Sam.

Sam pressed himself farther into the floor, "W-what's yours?"

The leader pretended to laugh before sending a kick into Sam's ribs. He felt one break and moaned rolling into himself.

"I said what's your name, punk!"

Sam smiled and was not going to answer but he felt himself being lifted up by his hair and quickly said, "S-Sam." With a wince.

The guy dropped Sam to the floor and said, "Alright, Sam. I'm Mike. Now tell me what the hell you're doing in our town."

Sam rolled his eyes and coughed out, "I'm w-with my brother, on b-business…"

"I bet you are. Now Sam listen to me. You're gonna get your brother and get the hell out of town. We're sick of outsiders coming in here and killing people. Understood?"

They were about to walk away and Sam couldn't help himself and whispered, "Go fuck yourself."

All the guys turned around and stared at the pile of blood and bruises on the floor, also known as Sam.

"Oh yeah?" Mike said taking a few steps closer to Sam, "Let's teach this smartass a lesson. All of you go look for any one else in town who's not supposed to be here…" he said glaring at Sam threateningly, "But Tim stay here with me."

Tim nodded and the other four guys left quickly not even bothering to look back at the person they were sure would be dead in less than a half an hour.

"W-what are you g-gonna d-do, hu-huh?" Sam stuttered out.

"You don't want to know." Mike whispered through the snow that was still falling.

Sam felt himself being lifted from the floor by two people. Mike had one arm and Tim had the other. He was thrown down into the snow. He felt himself being checked for anything he had on him. His wallet, cell phone and the five-dollar bill were pulled out.

"Five dollars, that's it? Not like any business man I've ever seen." Tim remarked.

Mike picked of the cell phone and dropped it to the floor before slamming his boot on top of it. Sam heard the crack and let his head fall into the snow. He'd given up on trying to see what they were doing.

"Tim go keep watch, I got it from here." Mike said. Tim nodded and left the two of them alone.

Sam wondered what exactly this guy wasn't going to him but the reality came crashing down around him when he felt his pant button being un-buttoned.

"Ew p-perv. W-what the fuck are y-you d-doing?" Sam asked trying to squirm away.

"I think you know, know shut your goddamn mouth." Mike said quickly.

Sam closed his eyes and tried to hold back tears when he felt his zipper open and his pants pulled down a little. He sent a few fists in his direction but they were pointless. He missed Mike completely and he was too weak and cold to hurt him any way.

Mike held Sam's wrists down and laughed when he saw the tears in the edges of his eyes. He stood up and kicked Sam in the side again and pulled down his pants. Sam tried to move away but there was nothing he could do he was trapped.

"P-please…" Sam whispered desperately.

"I said to shut the fuck up!" Mike responded.

Just when Sam's worst nightmare was about to come true the heard the wind howl and felt the snow coming down stronger now.

"Pplease… don't d-do this…" Sam begged.

Sam felt his jacket being unzipped and when Mike loosened it around his shoulders and began to lift Sam's shirt a little, he felt him self shake violently from the cold. 1 pair of lips kissed Sam's stomach and he let out a sob, knowing what was coming soon.

"No, don't cry." Mike whispered tauntingly while brushing some hair from Sam's eyes. Sam only stared at the crazy man in horror.

When Sam realized there was a hand creeping up his leg he quickly gave his last energy to try and push him off, this only annoyed Mike more who quickly grabbed Sam in the place he had been dreading.

This was Sam's breaking point. He let out sobs and shook his head in disbelief that this was happening to him.

"P-please… J-just st-stop…"

Mike continued with a smirk, enjoying Sam's pain. He laughed at how Sam was paying for coming into town and was about hurt Sam even more when he heard a distant call.

"Mike!"

Sam saw Mike roll his eyes but not respond.

"Mike! It's getting bad out here I think we should go!" Tim yelled from across the park.

Mike groaned and looked over in that direction, "Gimme a fucking minute!"

"Mike!"

Mike slammed his fist into Sam's chest and Sam coughed. Mike got off of Sam and whispered, "Fine." The weather was starting to worry him as well. He zipped up his pants and at that sound a wave of relief washed over Sam.

"Get out of town and stay out. That is, if you even survive this." Mike yelled at Sam before sending his foot flat onto the hunter's stomach.

"Mike!"

"I'm coming goddammit!" Mike yelled back before glancing at Sam once before running over to Tim.

Sam was in a world of shock and pain. Everything had happened so quickly he was surprised he still had some of his sanity and sense. That was the only thing that could help him right now. He reached out and his hand connected with the destroyed phone. He took one look at it and knew it was done. There was no way to call Dean.

He wondered if Dean would even answer the phone if he did call.

He couldn't cry right now. He needed to find a way to help himself since there was no one there to help him. He reached down and pulled his shirt down and zipped up his jacket. He wanted to pull up his pants but that would involve lifting his body in a way that was too painful right now.

The cold and snow was bitter sweat at this point. It was good because the cold was numbing him and making the pain feel much less than it really was. But he also knew that if he stayed out in this much longer he could get hypothermia or freeze to death.

He knew he had to get himself up because in not much longer he would be covered in snow. There was a tree about two feet away from him and he figured maybe he could drag himself over there and lean up against it.

That job proved to be much harder then it sounded. Sam was weak and cold and with every inch he dragged himself he felt something in his body move the way it wasn't supposed too. Plus his pants were still undone and snow was getting inside his clothes, making him even colder.

When the tree was in reach, Sam took hold on the truck and used it to pull himself up. He winced and let out a groan as he painfully pulled himself up. Once he was sitting he took a breath and then turned a little so he could lean up against the tree.

When he was settled he opened his eyes and looked around hopelessly. His only chance is that Dean would come looking for him or that someone would pass by and see him. The second was unlikely first of all because there was a blizzard and also because almost every person in town he had encountered hated him or in this case, tried to kill him.

Sam closed his eyes as he let out one last sob. He reached up a shaky hand to wipe away the tears that were turning to ice and stinging his face. There was no much else to do but wait so he let himself loose consciousness.

His only hope was Dean. The only person that could save him now was his brother.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: This is the longest chapter I've ever done for any story or a oneshot or anything. I could've cut it in two but since I got so many **amazing** reviews I thought I would do a long one. Thank you all so much it really means a lot to me to get a bunch of reviews on a story that's just starting out : ) I hope you all enjoy this chap and like Dean's reaction since a few of you wanted to see that. But seriously thanks again!! I'll try and update as much and as quickly as possible but the problem is I'm on vacation and the reason I've been writing so many upates for my fics is because I have long car rides like 7 hours but we just got to the main place we were going and there won't be long car rides for like 10 days but when I'm sitting around I'm gonna try to updateeee

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CHAPTER TWO

Dean looked out the frosted, snowy window at the at least foot and a half of snow on the ground. It was only getting worse and Sam had been gone for close to 45 minutes.

McDonalds was a 15-minute walk.

To say Dean was regretting not letting Sam take the car was an understatement.

"He's probably just taking his time or waiting it out inside… Come on Dean. Just call his cell everything will be fine." 

Dean wiped out his cell and pressed number two to call Sam on speed dial. He expected it to ring a few time before getting to the answering machine, but instead it went straight to voice mail.

Yeah, things weren't looking too good.

Dean closed his phone and took another nervous look out the window to see someone making their way into the motel. It wasn't Sam.

From what Dean could see, this person was being blow around like a toy. He couldn't even bare to think his brother was out somewhere stuck in this.

Thanks to him.

Sure he was still a little pissed at Sam, but no stupid fight would ever come in the way of him caring about his brother. So the only logical thing to do would be to go out and look for him.

Dean slammed his hand on the table picking up the keys and threw on a coat. There was a ratty old blanket on the bed and Dean graved it just in case Sam was really cold. He took one glance to make sure he didn't need anything else and slammed the door behind him. The Impala was parked on the side of the motel and he figured he would drive around and give his brother a lift back.

Dean was on the bottom level of the now deserted motel lobby, when suddenly all of the lights went out.

"What the-"

There was no flicker, which meant it, was no spirit, with his luck the weather had probably knocked out the power. Just what he needed now. He quickly pulled out his phone to try again, but when it didn't ring or go to voice mail he looked at the bars in the left corner to see he had no service.

From the minimal amount of light coming in through the glass door he noticed a phone on a table and picked it up to find no dial tone. No power. No cell phone service. No local land lines.

No nothing.

"This is all fucking FUCKED!" he screamed at the top of his lungs.

He slammed the phone down threw the door open and was caught by surprise when he remember the wind.

And you know, that little thing called the blizzard.

He had to use his entire body to close the door and was finally able to, pushing some snow back in to the motel. Dean leaned up against the door in exhaustion and looked around at the nightmare surrounding him. Finding Sam was going to be impossible at best.

Dean took a few steps forward and could already feel the snow making its way into his boots and jeans. After about ten steps he was able to see the Impala and even from the distance he already knew taking it out in this weather wasn't going to happen. The wheels were buried in at least a foot of snow and so were the roads. He loved his car, but it sure sucked in times like this.

"Goddammit." He whispered.

Dean turned around and crossed the street without even looking. What kind of car would be driving in this weather anyway? If he wasn't and he had a brother to find, then obviously no other lunatic would try to.

Dean had been walking for about ten minutes and now the park was in view. It's at this point that Dean finally thought to look down for footprints. Up until then, his only priority was to walk and try to get to the McDonalds to see if Sam was there. But then it dawned on him, his brother came this way and footprints would lead right to him.

Dean looked down and didn't see anything at first, but then after closer examination noticed a slight depression in the snow. Someone had come this way, and Sam was the only person who he knew was crazy enough to agree to go out in this weather.

The depressions were in the slight shape of footprints and followed the pattern foot prints would be in, so Dean decided to follow them. After Dean crossed the street he noticed the snow was slowing down, even though it was still freezing out. Dean could feel himself shivering, but he was running on adrenaline right now. No blizzard was going to stop him from getting to his little brother.

Dean had been slightly hopeful he would find Sam safe and sound inside somewhere until he noticed the footprints trail away from the sidewalk.

The slight depressions now were deep ones on the floor that looked like someone had lied down there. Dean cursed silently to him self and knew he didn't have to follow prints any more to know his brother was some where in the park.

He knew it wouldn't be wise to trail off from the main path in the park yet, he needed to stay in the most likely places Sam would be, before doing a thorough investigation of the area. Dean came across a bend and he noticed something leaned up against a tree.

"_That's not Sammy."_ Dean thought to himself.

Dean kept walking past the thing leaned up against the tree until he looked again to see a snowy mop. It was snowy but brown none the less. That was his brother. That was his brother's snowy mop of brother hair.

That was his brother, leaned up against the tree and covered in snow.

"Oh god, Sammy!" Dean yelled.

He had expected to find Sam like anything. He expected him to be safe and warm. He expected him to be resting on a bench. He expected him to be back in the motel room. But he never expected to find his baby brother like this.

Dean rushed to his side and quickly began the task of brushing the snow off of him. He first got all the snow from his head and shoulders. His face was icy and Dean could see the trails of tears that were frozen solid. He had to hold back his own tears as he continued to get the snow off.

Sam had regained consciousness after fighting hard and realizing he couldn't loose himself. He needed to be alert. But since then he had lost some of his sense as the affects of hypothermia set in. Right now he could feel someone frantically trying to free him from his snow prison but he felt no warmth from the hands. He didn't feel warmth from anything. He could feel the pressure of hands on him, but he couldn't tell who's they were. Were they Dean's? Where they a complete stranger's? Or could they be Mike's? Could it have stopped snowing and he was back to finish what he started?

"S-s-s-t-t…"

Dean was continuing to attempt to help his brother. He was thinking about how good it was Sam had gotten himself under a tree for a slight shelter from the snow. The area he was in wasn't as deep in snow as some of the other places. Dean wondered how long his brother had been out here and mentally kicked himself over and over. He couldn't believe what he had done.

He didn't even notice Sam's tries to talk.

"N-n-n-n…"

"Sammy?" Dean asked now relived Sam was awake.

"P-p-p-p…"

Dean let a small tear fall. His brother's mouth was barely open and his eyes were closed tightly. He was using all his energy to try and get a message across and Dean couldn't even hear him.

"Shhh… Hey. You're gonna be ok, all right? Save your energy." Dean whispered soothingly.

Sam's arms hung loosely at his sides. His head was slightly tilted towards the side and he looked to be extremely uncomfortable. Dean began brushing the snow from his brother's lap, and that's when he realized.

Everything.

The second Dean touched his brother's lap he heard Sam moan and try to move away. His body wasn't shivering anymore so any movement was easy to detect and Dean swore he felt his brother flinch away. Dean looked at his brother's face to ask what was wrong when he saw the bruises. The blood.

Sam's face was a bloody bruised mess. There was blood stained down the corners of his mouth and from his nose. He had a cut on his forehead and both his eyes were bruised.

"Jesus…" Dean whispered.

Dean quickly brushed the snow from his brother's jacket and unzipped it. His brother's shirt was bloody and ripped on one right side. He knew at this point someone had done this to him. Possibly more than one person. He felt his brother's stomach and quickly realized from the feel and the moan Sam made that some of his ribs were broken.

Dean was already vowing to kill these people and he didn't even know everything that had happened.

Dean could feel the tears stinging his eyes and he suddenly remembered that he needed to get Sam the hell out of here and into some place warm where he could work on him and warm him up.

"Sammy… Don't worry, ok? I'm gonna fix this…" Dean whispered in a teary voice. He was using all his strength to hold back sobs. Sobs he knew he didn't deserve to make, "Sammy if you can hear me, its Dean ok? It's Dean… I'm gonan help you, but I need you're help too… ok?"

He felt Sam's body relax and let out a sigh and a 'thank you' before brushing the snow from Sam's lap. When he was about to start brushing the snow from Sam's legs, he realized Sam's pants were pulled down.

He heard Sam moan again and he looked up to see his baby brother's eyes open. Sam tried to say nothing more just let a lonely tear roll down his check. He swallowed hard and looked down at Dean's hands and then back into his eyes. Sam was trying to keep his eyes open. He was trying to talk. He was trying to get up, but he could do nothing. His body was glued to the tree. He gently closed his eyes and tried to calm himself down.

Dean knew what had happened. Everything made perfect sense. The flinching away, the bruises, the blood, the tears. Dean knew what this bastard had done to his brother.

But he couldn't admit it to himself

Dean quickly chose the route of denial before anyone had the chance to make him choose any different. He quickly took the pants and pulled them up gently, buttoning and zipping them back up. This was too much for Dean to handle. Here he was the last hour or so thinking his brother was fine, to suddenly find him like this. His Sammy like_ this._

"I-I…" Dean couldn't find his voice but then put his own distress aside and said, "I need your help S-Sammy…"

Sam slowly opened his asking eyes and waited for Dean to give him an order. Waited for his brother to tell him what to do cause he sure as hell didn't know.

"I-I need you to help me get you on your feet. I have a blanket for you too, ok? We'll get you somewhere warm…" Dean said quietly to his brother.

Sam's eyes fought to stay open as he winced in pain through his frozen face and took in two deep breaths. He blinked in acknowledgement of what his brother had suggested and waited for more pain to come as his brother got him up.

Dean whispered an 'ok' and pulled his brother's long right arm around his shoulder. Sam groaned a little in response to the movement and Dean quickly took the opportunity to lift his brother to his feet. Once Sam was on his feet the rest of the snow fell to the floor except for some that was frozen to his clothing. Dean tried to shut out the noises his brother was making through frozen lips and vocal chords to express his pain. They were unlike any sound his brother had ever made before and Dean wanted them erased from his memory as soon as possible. He never wanted to hear Sam like that again.

Dean threw the blanket he had brought around their shoulders and began dragging his brother out of the park; knowing Sam had no control of his frozen limps. Sam continued to moan and Dean silently prayed he would stop. His pained sounds weren't making this job any easier.

"S-Sammy… please stop…" Dean begged and felt guilty for opening his mouth right away when Sam stopped immediately, taking Dean's request as an order.

Dean couldn't believe he had asked that of his brother. He was the one frozen and in pain and Dean was asking him to shut up. Asking him to stop making Dean feel bad. Dean urged Sam a little to stop masking his pain, but it was useless. Sam remained silent.

A few minutes later they were out of the park and the snow had been reduced to flurries, thankfully. The town probably had a back up generator for some of their streetlights because a few of them were still on. The buildings were mostly all dark except for a couple that were probably hooked up to the same power as the streetlights. He squinted into the distance to see an open door producing light that was letting a few women inside. Dean figured it was a shelter or something so began the task of getting Sam over there.

It took another few minutes to get there and Dean noticed another woman going inside.

"Hey!" Dean called out after the woman holding the door open. She was a slightly heavy lady wearing a heavy purple coat and a black scarf tied up around her neck firmly.

"Can I help you?" She asked kindly

Dean nodded and lifted his brother up a little more, "Is this a shelter? Can we come in?"

The woman looked at Dean sympathetically and sent a glance at Sam, but then replied, "I'm sorry, honey. This shelter is for women and children only. There's another one-"

Dean quickly cut the lady off, "No, no, no you don't understand. My brother. He's hurt really bad, he's been out in the cold, and I need to get him inside- I need to…"

The woman looked at Sam. His head was leaning against his chest and he was damp and full of snow. He had a cheap blanket over him that seemed ripped and useless to shield him from the unforgiving weather.

"I'm really not supposed to… Alright get him inside." The woman said with a small smile on her face as she held the door open a little more.

"Thank you, thank you so much…" Dean said as he got Sam up the two stairs separating him from warmth.

Unfortunately, once he was inside there was only a little bit of warmth. He quickly realized the only reason there was light was because there was a large flashlight in the entranceway. The only other light in the small shelter came from flashlights and candles.

"This way, Hun…" the woman said leading Dean into a room that looked like a kitchen. There was an open entrance to a big room where most of the other people in the shelter were either talking or wrapped in a thin blanket. The room was dark except for a few candles Dean eyed the place and inhabitants suspiciously and looked down at his brother excessively.

"Put him here…" the woman said gesturing to a beaten up coach up against a wall, "What are your names?" she asked trying to loosen up the tension in the room

Dean slowly put Sam down on the coach and covered him with the blanket before saying, "I'm Dean and he's Sam… and you're?"

"I'm Marie." She said quickly. She then had an opportunity to really see Sam's condition and gasped, "Oh my… oh god, what happened?" she asked in a genuinely worried voice kneeling down next to the boy.

Dean ran his hand through his hair and held back a few tears as he looked at his brother in the dim light, "He… I don't know… I just… I just found him like that…"

Marie nodded. "Don't you worry, hun. We're gonna take good care of Sam, ok? How about I get some blankets and something warm to drink. I think I have some dry clothes he could wear in the back…" she half-said to Dean, half-whispered to herself as she scurried out of the room.

Dean quickly got down to his brother's side and frowned. Every part of his face not bruised or bloodied was shaded pink and his lips had a bluish tint to them. Sam belonged in a hospital, not the kitchen of a woman shelter that didn't have heat. He hated himself for not being able to do better by his brother. For not being able to save him from whatever happened to him in that park.

"Oh Sammy… What did they do to you?" Dean whispered, "I'm so, so sorry…"

Dean touched Sam's jacket and for the first time realized how damp it was. Dean touched the rest of his brother's clothes and they were wet too.

"Sorry Sammy…" Dean whispered to no one and lifted his brother's torso and gently eased the coat off. Once it was off, he realized his shirt partially damp too. He began pulling the shirt up over Sam's stomach.

Sam's eyes closed tighter and he moaned and struggled, "N-n-n…" he whispered.

Dean looked his brother over and whispered, "Sam its Dean… Ok? I have to get these wet clothes off… Alright?" he said trying to calm his brother down. He obviously had no idea where he was or what was happening and was trying with all he had to protect himself.

"D-d-d-e-e?" Sam stuttered barely audibly as he opened his eyes a tiny bit.

"Yeah, Sammy…" Dean said reassuringly as he pulled the shirt over Sam's neck.

Sam flopped back and forth. Once the shirt was off completely, Sam's head lolled to the side and he began to fall back. Dean caught him and gently put his brother down. Dean took of his coat that wasn't nearly as wet as Sam's and placed it protectively over his little brother.

"s-s-sor-r-"

"Don't try to talk Sammy, save up your strength." Dean whispered moving a few damp bangs from Sam's eyes.

Sam looked a little frustrated but listened to his brother. Dean began trying to get Sam's pants off. Once he waited for Sam to relax a little, knowing he would flinch when he felt Dean unbutton his pants. Dean was correct and once Sam had relaxed he continued getting the wet clothes away from his brother's body.

Once Sam was only in his boxers, Dean looked over his brother's body and placed his hand over his face and pinched his mouth. His brother was bruised all over, especially in the stomach. He had large purple bruises and places where he had been beaten so hard, the skin had broken and was bleeding. Dean held back even more tears. He couldn't stand to see his brother in such bad shape. Who ever had done this to his brother would pay.

Just then Marie appeared in the doorway, her arms full with supplies. Behind her were a few small children and a couple nosy older women.

"Marie, who are these young men you've brought in here?" one of the women asked in a slightly flirty way. Dean turned around to see who had said that and when she winked in his direction he shuddered and continued to tend to his brother.

"Get out of here all of you! These boys need their privacy!" Marie yelled. Once they had all disappeared from the doorway she turned back to Dean and whispered, "Good, you got those clothes off… here are some dry ones."

Dean received a long t-shirt and sweat pants and then asked, "Why do you have men's clothes here?"

"My son's… He left them here unless he needs a change when he's in town and can't get into the house a lot of the women who come here have son's that age too so we keep them around just in case… Your brother kind of reminds me of him. That out of control hair, my son has the same thing…" Marie said quietly while pouring some hot milk into a cup.

Dean smiled weakly and said, "I know what you mean…" as he looked at his resting brother.

Marie turned around and shook her head at the condition Sam was in, "Do you think some one did this to him?" she asked quietly.

Dean said nothing and didn't take his eyes off his brother. He just nodded and started to get his brother into the dry clothes. Marie silently began helping, once Sam was fully dressed, Dean threw his coat and the blanket back over his brother.

"There's no phone service, but I'll keep checking and the second there is I'll cal an ambulance. Let me go and find a first aid kit and some more blan-"

Marie was interrupted by the same older woman from before who emerged in the doorway holding a blanket in the air, "He can have mine!"

Marie sighed but accepted the blanket and handed it to Dean. Dean thanked the woman and her face lit up before she carried herself back to the other room. Marie left in search of the kit and more blankets. They needed to warm Sam up as much as they could.

Dean was instructed to get Sam to drink the warm milk on the table next to them so Dean picked it up and gently tried to wake his brother.

"Sammy, come on I need you to drink this…" Dean whispered.

Sam's eyes opened a little and he gazed up at Dean. He snuggled deeper into the warm jacket. He still felt freezing but he was doing a little better than before.

"D-dee…" Sam stuttered.

"Yeah Sammy… I need you to drink this…" Dean whispered gesturing to the cup in his hand. Sam tried to push himself up a little but failed and pouted in frustration, "Hey, it's ok, lemme help you up…"

Dean helped Sam sit up a little more and supported his head as he slowly tipped the cup towards his mouth. Sam took a few sips before Dean tilted it a little too much and Sam began choking on it. Dean quickly pulled the glass away as Sam let out a few weak coughs.

"Aww I'm sorry Sammy, just breath…" Dean said, frustrated with himself. He took a napkin from the table and dried Sam's chin.

"D-dee… I-I-'m s-s-sor-ry… I-I lo-s-st… y-y-our mo-ney… " Sam choked out.

Dean felt like crying now. His brother was barely hanging on to life, frozen and beaten and he was apologizing for loosing Dean's five dollars. Dean didn't say anything at first just gently took his brother's hand into his and stroked his damp hair as his eyes watered with tears.

For someone who didn't cry Dean sure was doing a lot of it.

"Don't worry Sammy. It doesn't matter. Just rest… You're gonna be okay… I promise… You're gonna be okay…"

"C-cold-d…"

Dean quickly tucked the edges of the blanket under his brother's legs and wrapped the coat around his torso a little tighter.

"Better?" Dean asked gently.

Sam nodded shakily.

"I'm so sorry Sammy, this is all my fault…" Dean whispered.

"D-don' w-wor-ry D-dee… 'm f-fine.."

Dean shook his head a little, but Sam just continued, "N-not y-you-r f-f-fault…"

"Sam stay awake." Dean said firmly.

"O-o-k D-Dean… J-j-jus don le 'im c-come…"Sam whispered closing his eyes.

"Who, Sam?" Dean asked.

"'im…"

"Sam? Sam, wake up!"

Sam said nothing in response. He was already asleep.

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A/N: Thanks for reading and I hope you liked that chapter leave me a review and let me know what you think and if theirs anyway you think I could improve luv u all : )


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Okay : )) here's the next chapter I hope you all like it ) Thanks again for all the great reviews thank you all sooo much. Here's another long update which is actually a little longer in word than the other one. I put it on my profile, but I'm looking for a beta for any of my stories including this one, I'm feeling like I need a second opinion on a lot of my stuff so if ur interested Message me! Alsoo Dean _**WILL**_ be kicking some ass soon, and that will not be the only time we see from Mike. A hint he maybe coming to Sam and Dean.

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CHAPTER THREE

Marie returned to the room about 10 minutes after Sam had fallen asleep. She had found three ratty blankets and a big first aid kit in the basement which would have to do for now. The snow was still falling lightly and no cars, not even ambulances dared drive in that snow. Dean didn't have the heart to try and wake his brother even though he knew it was important for Sam to stay awake even if Dean was taking care of him.

"Here." Marie said handing him the blankets. Dean took them in his hands and began wrapping his brother with them. He tucked each and every edge firmly under his brother's body that was still cold to the touch.

Dean looked at his brothers damp hair, "Do you have like a blow dryer or something?' he asked Marie.

Marie smiled sadly, "Yes, but the electricity, hun."

Dean nodded and whispered, "Forgot,"

Marie walked back over to Sam's side with a few bandages for Dean to patch up Sam's face. Dean looked at his brother and started thinking about what they had done to him. From the evidence he had found they had obviously robbed him, beaten him, and to Dean's worst nightmare, they raped him. He didn't know what exactly had happened and if he had been raped completely but Dean couldn't help but think the worst.

That thought made Dean sick to his stomach. Before he had a chance to hold it in he ran to a garbage can on the other side of the room and made it just in time to catch the contents of his stomach. Dean couldn't believe he was letting himself be sick in a time like this. His brother needed him. His brother needed him to take care of him.

Dean started to get up and walk back over to Marie, but she held her hand out, "How about I patch him up and you try and get him warm? Huh?"

Dean eyed the woman and wondered if he could trust her with his Sammy. Dean probably would have said no to almost any other person but there was something about her that made him want to trust her. Or maybe it was the fact that he had no idea how to handle this and he was willing to rely on anyone for a little bit of help.

Dean nodded and knelt down next to Sam's legs. He watched carefully as she gently patched up his baby brother. She cleaned the blood from his face with warm water and bandaged the cut. Dean just tried to warm up his brother by rubbing his legs back and forth or holding his hand, he'd read somewhere that if you warm up someone's hands and feet they feel warmer.

"Is he hurt anywhere else, Dean?" Marie asked kindly after she had finished with his face.

Dean nodded slowly and said, "Yeah… I think a few of his ribs are broken, and he has some wounds on his stomach… I…"

"Alright honey, let's have a look… We're going to have to take the blankets off for a few minutes but we'll be quick. We have to take care of his wounds, we wouldn't want him to get an infection." Marie softly suggested

Dean just nodded. He hated the thought of pulling his brother away from the slight warmth for even a second, but they needed to take care of all his injuries.

Marie slowly began to pull the blanket's edges out from under Sam and once they were all out she pulled the blankets and Dean's coat off of him. Dean shuddered when he saw his brother visible shiver. He wanted nothing more than to transfer Sam's pain and discomfort to himself. He'd rather by dying than see his brother like this.

Once the blankets were only covering his waist down, Marie began to pull the shirt up. It was already blood stained from Sam's wounds, Dean hadn't even thought to clean then when he changed his brother. His only thought was to get him warm.

Sam's stomach was purple and red. The cuts were thin, and didn't look infected, but if they didn't take care of them now they would be. Marie quickly patched up the wounds and then frowned. If Dean was right about Sam's ribs then that meant Sam would be in a lot of pain when they had to wrap them. She pressed two fingers as gently as she could to his stomach and almost jumped when Sam's eyes fluttered and he let out a small whimper. The noise wasn't much, but from the tension in that room a pin dropping would startle any one.

"D-dee" Sam whispered, his teeth chattering.

"Yeah Sammy, I'm here." Dean said moving up into Sam's line of sight so he wouldn't have to move. Sam frowned under his brother's worried gaze.

"C-cold-d ag-g-ain…" he whispered slightly embarrassed.

Dean nodded, "I'm sorry Sammy we gotta patch you up. I think a few of your ribs are fractured or broken so we need to take care of that, then we'll get you nice and warm, ok?" Dean waited for Sam to nod and then he gestured for Marie to check his ribs again.

Marie looked at Sam and moved over a little so he could see her and said, "Sam, I'm going to have to check your ribs again. This is going to hurt but I'll be as gentle as possible, Kay?"

Sam looked at her a little confused and then asked, "W-who…"

Marie already new what he was asking and didn't want to make him talk more than he had to so she responded, "I'm Marie. You're at the Holy Angel's Women's Shelter, here in town. I run this place."

Dean smiled and tried to lighten the mood by saying, "Which fits, Samantha since you're a total girl."

Sam tried his hardest to smile even though that was the last thing he really wanted to do. He nodded for Marie to continue and braced himself for the pain to come when she checked his stomach again. The pain was unimaginable as she poked around. He did he best to control his cries and tears of pain, and in result he only let out a yelp. Dean noticed it and took Sam's hand into his and massaged small circles on the top of his thumb. The human contact startled Sam as first but then when he realized it was only his brother.

"Dean, we're going to have to sit him up so I can wrap his rib, I think it's fractured…" Marie stopped when she saw Dean nod and she walked to the table to get the medical tape. She came back and put the tape on her lap as she helped Dean get Sam into a sitting position.

Sam had reached his tolerance level and as he was lifted into position he shut his eyes in agony and moaned. The tears now streaming down his checks uncontrollably. Marie moved to act quickly and tried her best to ignore his moans. The pain wasn't going away, it just wouldn't stop. Sam sniffled and tried to calm himself down as best he could.

"Hey, don't cry."

_No don't cry. No don't cry. No don't cry…._

With the two words that left dean's mouth, Sam suddenly remember everything that had happened. Why he was in pain. Why they needed to check him out. Why he was so fucking freezing. The innocence that came with his brother's soft encouragements and Marie's gentle hands taking care of him were gone. The little warmth he felt from being half way tucked in blankets, gone. The safety of being inside with people that were trying to help him. You guessed it. Gone.

And these hands holding him in position. The firm grasps around his shoulder, weren't Dean's. They were a stranger's. They couldn't be Dean's because as far as he was concerned he was outside again. He was buried in the snow. He was staying awake for dear life. He was squirming away for the little or no dignity he had left.

Sam was doing everything he could to get away from this lunatic. This lunatic trying to rob him of his body. But he was weak. He could do nothing.

Sam began flailing and moving around wildly even though his damaged body barely aloud it. Dean could tell he was only hurting himself as he wiggled and twitched.

"N-n-no p-p-p…" Sam whispered, but it was useless. He was gonna do it again. Mike was gonna finish what he started.

"Sam, please calm down." Dean whispered panicked at his brother's reaction. He knew Sam was scared since he was holding him so tightly, but he needed to let Marie finish.

She was almost done as she placed the last piece of tape around him and rolled down his shirt. Dean sighed in relief and held Sam's back as he put him down on the coach. Sam was continuing to squirm, so Dean held his shoulders, knowing this would probably scare him even more.

Dean was right. Sam became even more fearful as the attack replayed in his mind. Rewind. Play. Stop. Repeat. His worst nightmare continuing to haunt him even thought it was his brother's hands that held him.

"P-p-ple-ase… d-d-don-n't…" Sam stuttered out, horrified.

Dean frowned; his brother thought he was trying to hurt him. He looked up at Marie and could see the tears in her eyes. She was crying and all she knew was that someone beat him up. He caught Marie's eye and whispered, "Why do you… He wasn't doing this before…"

Marie shook her head, confused herself, "Maybe it was something one of us said or did?"

Dean just nodded and tried to shh his brother into realizing it was him, but now all Sam was doing was shaking his head and begging over and over again. His teeth were chattering, his body shaking violently. He was close to sobbing and was probably already there.

"Sammy, it's me, Dean. Come on now, calm down you're gonna hurt yourself." Sam opened his eyes and blinked slightly confused. Mike never called him Sammy. Mike wouldn't care if he hurt himself, this couldn't be him.

Sam's sobs stopped but now he just took in deep teary breaths as he tried to calm himself. He was still shaking but all his head did was fall to the side a little as he examined his brother's worried features. It _was_ Dean.

"De… n-n-n…" was all Sam could get out. He stopped trying to get away as he let soft tears fall from his eyes. Not panicked ones like before but saddened ones. Ones that only formed because his brother had seen him like this, had seen him beg.

Dean sighed in relief as did Marie and they quickly got to tucking the blankets back around him. Sam's eyes just shot around drowsily as he tried to figure out what they were doing to him. He felt Dean rubbing his legs, but it was more of just a sensation. He didn't feel the warmth or the actual shape of his hands, he just felt something moving up and down them desperate to warm him up and he knew it was his brother this time.

"H-he… h-he…" Sam wanted to tell Dean what had happened to him. If he wasn't so out of it he would have kept it to himself, but now he wasn't thinking as himself. He was thinking as a hurt little brother who needed his big brother to fix everything. Maybe telling Dean what happened would fix all of this.

Dean moved up to his brother's line of sight and settled for rubbing his arms. He stroked Sam's hair and asked, "He what, Sammy?"

Sam swallowed and whispered, "H-h-he... t-to-u…." he couldn't get the horrible words up his frozen throat and as they started to come up he wasn't sure if he wanted to.

Dean looked at Sam desperate for an answer, "What Sam, what did 'he' do?"

Sam blinked trying to get the tears away from his eyes. Marie noticed and was quick to act by getting a tissue box form the other side of the room and handing it to Dean. Dean took it and pulled out a tissue and began wiping Sam's face of all its wetness. Sam sniffled and tried to stop himself but there was no end to the tears streaming down his face.

Sam looked to the side and through half opened eyes he saw someone else standing there. Someone he couldn't recognize. He freaked and began to push himself into the side of the sofa, "W-wh-o… w-w-why d-did… y-you... l-let-t th-them-m in-n?" Sam asked. Had his brother let them in to do it to him again? He saw no other reason for someone else to be in the room, standing over him.

Dean shook his head, and said "No Sammy, no I would never… This is Marie; she's the nice lady that let us in here. We just told you that remember?" Sam shook his head slowly and Dean felt like crying. They had told him that was Marie three minutes ago and when he freaked out he completely forgot.

Dean explained who Marie was and where they were, before Sam finally believed him and Marie introduced herself. She smiled and said, "I don't want you to worry Sam. We're gonna take care of you, ok?"

Sam's only response was to nod. Dean noticed that his eyes were starting to close little by little and Dean asked, "Sammy you wanna rest a little and then we'll talk about this later, when you feel better?" Sam was hesitant at first but then nodded.

"k-kay... D-d-dee-n…" he whispered before falling asleep.

Dean stopped squatting and let himself fall down on his butt. He didn't know what to do and he looked at Marie for answers as if she had them. Marie knew what he wanted, but she couldn't give him an answer until she knew everything he knew.

"Why don't we talk, hun?" she asked. Dean nodded and them moved over to the table, Marie followed. She gestured to a pot of coffee sitting on the table and asked, "You want some? It's probably cold but…"

Dean nodded, "Sure."

She poured two cups of pointless cold coffee. Once he had taken a sip or two she asked, "So what happened?"

Dean swallowed and tried to avoid looking Marie in the eye, "We were in town on… business. The business isn't doing so well so we're low on money. All I could get us is this cheap ass motel room with one single bed," Dean said with a slight smile and a shake of the head. Marie thought it was kind of funny too about the room and let her face form a small smile, he continued, "But my brother. He wouldn't stop complaining. I got sort of pissed at him, told him off. I think I made him feel really guilty. I said things I didn't mean…"

Marie frowned, "What kind of things?"

Dean shook his head disgusted with himself, "Told him he never brings in any of the money it's all me. Made fun of him going to college and not even being able to bring the money like I do. And then I… I told him to go get us something to eat from the McDonalds a few blocks from the motel…"

Marie looked a little confused, "Did he take a car or-"

"No. I wouldn't let him… I… god. This is all my fucking fault." Dean said his voice getting louder as he became angrier with himself.

"No Dean don't say-"

Dean laughed, "Don't say what? I'm the one that sent my brother out into the middle of a blizzard after making him feel guilty with only a long sleeve shirt and a cheap coat? I did that! If I hadn't sent him out like that those people wouldn't have…" Dean voice trailed off unable to say what he thought happened.

Marie shook her head and moved in a little closer to Dean, "Dean, Sam will get better he'll forgive you and his scars will heal…"

Dean looked away and said, "No not the kind of scars I think he has."

Marie looked puzzled and asked, "What do you mean?"

Dean closed his eyes and tried to make the tears disappear as he began telling the worst part, "I found him in the park… down the road… He'd been gone for 45 minutes and then that's when I started worrying… I'm walking and then I realize his footprints. They led into the park, and I see him. He was leaned up against a tree… completely covered in snow. I started brushing the snow off him first his shoulders and face. Then his stomach… But when I got to his lap… he start moaning and trying to… to get away…" Dean could feel the tears burning their way down his checks, "I looked closer and that's when I realized how hurt he really was. I… I lifted his… shirt and he was in so much pain… So I knew I had to get him out of there, I started brushing the snow off his lap when I realized… ah god…"

Marie hadn't let herself think of what could have happened yet and was still confused at what Dean was getting at and asked, "What Dean, did we miss a wound on his-"

"No." Dean interrupted, "His pants… They were pulled down."

That was all Dean had to say for Marie to know what was troubling him so much. Why he felt so guilty. Marie choked in a small breath of sadness and looked at the boy shivering in his sleep. She looked back at Dean and saw he was crying and before he said anything moved in and wrapped her arms around him in a motherly sort of way.

Dean didn't know what to do, just hugged her back appreciating her sympathy even though he usually wanted none from nobody. Th hugged for a few minutes probably both crying and Dean just listened as she whispered encouragements in his ear like he had been doing for Sam.

"It's gonna be ok, Dean." She whispered into his ear before pulling away. Dean nodded slightly as she stood up, "I better… You need to be with your brother right now… I'm gonna tell everyone to stay away. Your brother doesn't blame you, Dean. I know he doesn't…" She stood up and walked over to Sam. She bent over and gently storked his hair a little as tears began to cascade down her cheeks She didn't know what exactly had happened, but she knew something. Dean didn't seem like the type to jump to conclusions. And after Sam's reaction… She knew something horrible had been done to this boy. "I'm gonna go check on the other people here… But if anything – I mean anything. Come find me, ok?" She waited for Dean to acknowledge her and then said, "It's gonna be alright sweetie. We'll find the creeps that did this to him."

He knew they would.

Dean watched over his brother for close to an hour with no change; Sam stayed asleep, the snow kept falling and the electricity failed to work. Cell phone service was still gone. There was no way to call for help.

Sam hadn't moved in his sleep, but continued to shiver in an obvious uncontrollable way. His hair was still wet and his skin still cold to the touch. The blankets were helping, but what he really needed was a hospital. He needed real doctors and real medicine. He needed a real hospital room no matter how much he hated them. By now Dean had moved from the 'this can't be happening' stage and was already on the 'this is all my fucking fault' stage. All he really cared about at this point was making Sam find a way to forgive him, and finding the bastards that did this to his baby brother, his Sam.

Not many people dared come into the room. They'd been warned about the angry and over protective older brother in there. A few little girls stood in the doorway and looked in, but ran away the second Dean started to turn around. Not many older women had come in though. Dean had thought maybe that woman who seemed to have a crush on him, would and maybe he needed the slight humor.

"Hey Mister!"

Dean's head shot around from his brother to a little boy standing in the doorway with his hands on his hips. Dean raised his eyebrows at the boy. His hair was long and unruly, just like Sam's and he was making his way into the room, even though Dean was sure he'd been told not to.

"Don't you know this place is only for kids and Moms?" he asked with an attitude. This kid wouldn't last a second in John Winchester's house.

"Yes I do." Dean said with just as much attitude.

"Then what are you doing here?" he asked pulling a chair over next to Dean.

Dean tried to remain patient and answered, "They made an exception my-"

"Who's that!" the boy exclaimed. Dean was about to answer him but he just continued with the questioned, "Why's he all pale? And why's he shivering like that?"

Dean frowned and looked at Sam as he answered, "He's my brother… He got caught out in the storm and got sick…"

The little boy continued with the questions, "Did you find him? Is he gone get better?"

Dean answered quickly, "Of course he is! And yeah I did find him… What your name, kid?"

"Jason." He said emphasizing each syllable.

"I'm Dean, and he's my brother Sam." Dean said as he rubbed Sam's arm gently trying warm him up.

Jason noticed and asked, "Is he your little brother?"

Dean smiled a little, "Yeah he is."

Jason nodded, "I could tell, I have a little brother too."

Dean turned to him and said, "Oh yeah? What's his name?"

Jason rolled his eyes, "His name's Billy, but I don't really like him. He's annoying."

Dean looked over at Jason a little shocked that he would say something like that about his brother and responded, "But don't you love him, don't you take care of him?"

Jason shrugged, "I guess but he's annoying all the time. I don't like taking care of him."'

Dean shook his head and explained, "Listen Jason, all little brother's are annoying. Sam here is probably one of the most annoying of them all, but no matter what you always take care of them and you always watch out for them. They look up to you so, you wanna be nice to them."

The younger looked a little surprised and asked, "Does Sam look up to you?"

Dean smiled widely and said, "Of course he does! Always has."

"I don't know. My brother said he wanted to go as far away form my as possible when he got older." Jason said a little disappointed.

Dean sympathized with the little boy because he automatically thought of Sam going off to Stanford and leaving him all alone, "How old are you and your brother, Jason?"

"I'm eight and my brother's six." Jason said.

Dean nodded, "Well I'm 27 and my brother's 23 and he left me and my dad for a little while to go to college but he came back. If your brother ever goes away, he'll always come back. Little brother's can't stay away from big brother's too long."

Jason nodded a little happier that maybe his little brother looked up to him. They sat in silence for about a minute as Dean continued to check on Sam and make she he was doing ok. Jason just stared at the 23 year old man lying there in such bad shape.

"Hey Dean?" Jason asked.

Dean turned his attention back to the boy and said, "Yeah?"

"You said you always take care of your little brother… Does he ever take care of you?"

Dean nodded almost to himself and looked at his brother, "He always does."

Dean glanced at Jason and saw his wide smile when they both heard an 'ahem' from the doorway. They both turned around to see the woman that winked at Dean before standing in the doorway.

"What are you doing in here, boy? You know they told you no kids were aloud in here!" The woman screeched.

Jason stood up and put his hands on his hips, "No they said no one was aloud in here! Not you either!"

The woman shook her head, "I can go where ever I please, boy. Now go back to your mother before I tell her you were wondering off while she slept! Go! Go!"

Jason cast one more glance at Dean before he scurried from the room. Jason knew no one in their right mind would try and really argue with this crazy old lady. And was glad Dean didn't try to.

"Stupid boy…" the woman whispered just loud enough for Dean to hear. Dean narrowed his eyes a little as the woman approached him. She waddled over to the now empty chair and sat her self down dramatically, "Aww poor boy." She said unsympathetically towards Sam.

Dean at this point wanted to tell this woman to leave, but didn't really feel like dealing with her outrage when he did. He just turned to her and asked, "Can I help you?" in a polite yet obviously fake voice.

The woman seemed to disregard his tone and continued, "Hmmm. You know I'm not homeless… I just was walking home in this horrible cold and I decided to stop inside. Little did I know the power would go out and I'd be stuck here? Ha!" she shouted loudly and Dean jumped.

"I'm sure… Listen-"

She knew he was about to ask her to leave and continued, "I'm Laurie by the way."

Dean nodded, "Well I'm Dean, but I really have to-"

"Dean…" she purred, "That name is so…" The woman pulled up her skirt a little and Dean made a disgusted face and gagged, she continued with her pointless talking and said, "You know my husband left me. I still don't know why though! I must say I am a very… fulfilling wife…"

Dean tried to stop himself from throwing up right then and there and said, "That must have been very hard for you."

"Now that I think of it, he looked just like _you_ when we got engaged! What a coincidence!" the woman smiled exposing her yellow teeth on the other side of her drugstore peach lipstick that only sat in the corners of her mouth.

Dean didn't really know what to say to this lady. She was obviously flirting with him like there was some chance in hell he would be interested in her.

"Unfortunately for you we would never work out…" She said suddenly, "My son is about your age, you're what 25, 26?" Dean only nodded, "He's coming here later to pick me up, I called him before the power went out. I'm sure he would like you, he's such a kind, gentle boy."

Dean looked to the side and asked, "Yeah, what's his name?"

The woman sighed dramatically and answered, "Mike."

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A/N: Hope you liked it, sorry to end on a sort of cliffie, but yeah : ) PLEASE REVIEW!!! I'll try and update soon!!!!


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Sorry I haven't updated, so much going on right now lots of Homework and other commitments and stuff so I'm trying my best to update. I hope you like this chapter. I found it really hard to write, that's partly why it took so long (sorry again) but I'm sorry it ends on another cliff hanger… Hope ya like : )

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CHAPTER FOUR

Dean endured Lourie's nonsense for only a little while longer before he was able to get her to leave. He told her he 'really should be watching his brother' and after a little more persuasion she was gone and Dean was left with the only person he wanted to be with.

Sam's cheeks were lightly shaded pink and the rest of him was a mass of ratty blankets and damp jackets. Dean placed a hand on his brother's cheek and flinched at the cold. His brother was improving, but not as fast as he would be if he were in a hospital.

The small human contact between the brothers was enough to wake the youngest one from his sleep. Sam slowly opened his eyes and gazed up at his brother. Dean smiled almost in disbelief that right when he needed his brother was when he decided to wake up. Dean stroked Sam's cheek a few times, excited that his brother was awake even though he knew he needed rest.

"You need anything, Sammy? Anything at all?" Dean asked hopefully. He wanted to do something for his brother.

Sam just shook his head weakly and managed a small cough, "Y-youuv-v d-don-nn-ne ev-ever-y-th-thi-ng…"

_No, I've ruined everything._

Dean couldn't even bare to look at his brother when he had so much faith. Sam had so much faith in Dean and Dean felt like he was continuing to let him down. He wanted his brother to be mad at him. He wanted someone to recognize that this was his entire fault, and if he hadn't been such an ass to his brother none of this would have happened.

Dean forced a small smile and stroked the top of his brother's head. He looked down at his brother and whispered, "Your gonna be ok, Sammy. Nothing else will ever happen to you."

It wasn't exactly true – that nothing else would ever happen to his brother – but that didn't matter right now. Right now the only thing that mattered is that his brother know – or thought everything was going to be ok. Even if it wasn't.

Sam believed his brother and after his reassurance began to drift back to sleep. Sam's eyes were slipping closed, but Dean never stopped the contact between them. Partly because he was afraid if he did Sam would get scared and partly because he never wanted to let go of his brother. They needed each other equally.

Sam had been sleeping for at least twenty minutes, but Dean remained there stroking him gently, afraid to stop. He didn't notice Marie watching from the doorway as small tears formed in her eyes. She knew this wasn't Dean's fault, but there was so much guilt in him. She didn't think anyone would be able to get through to him.

"Dean." Marie called softly.

Dean turned to Marie and settled for holding Sam's hand as she made her way in to the room.

"Yeah?" he asked.

She knelt down next to the guilt-ridden hunter and said, "It's stopped snowing. The electricity and cell phone services are still down, but the streets are starting to be cleared for ambulances to get to the area. I know a hospital; it's only a couple miles from here. If you want I could tell you how to get there and you could go and come back with an ambulance for Sam, or we could wait for the service to come back. It's all up to you."

Dean looked a little overwhelmed by all the information and simply looked at his brother, unsure what to do. He knew his brother needed to be in an ambulance and going to a hospital, but he was afraid what would happen to Sam's mental state if he woke up and Dean wasn't there.

"I can't leave him." Dean said quietly.

Marie sighed, "You can't take him with you, Dean. And he needs to go to a hospital. We could wait… But we don't know how long it's gonna be until someone comes around here or the phones start working." Dean frowned at Marie's truthful reasoning, "I think that you should go Dean, I'll watch after Sam. I know your going to do what you think is best for you and Sam. Just keep in mind that what he might need most now is a doctor."

Marie was right. Doctor Dean just wasn't going to cut it. He needed modern medicine and machines that can warm him up. Dean now saw the opportunity to get just that. All he had to do was leave Sam for a little while.

"I'm just worried he's gonna get scared." Dean said now looking at Marie.

Marie nodded understanding his concern and answered, "I'll kept an eye on him and make sure I'm here if he wakes up to explain, ok?"

Dean nodded and said, "I'll go in a few minutes, can I just have a little time with Sam?"

Marie smiled and nodded. She placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder before getting up and exiting the room. Dean was left alone in the room with the brother he was about to leave.

Dean couldn't wake him. He worried if he did Sam wouldn't fall back asleep and he would have to leave while he was awake. Dean put his hand on Sam's arm while he stroked gently waiting for the right words to come to his tongue even though the words would be heard by no ears but his own.

"Alright, Sam." He whispered, his head bobbing and his mouth hanging open when the words were gone, "I've uh… I have to go and get you an ambulance. Cuz… well… You're getting better, but we still need to get you to a hospital. And I'm gonna be quick… I'll be back before you know I'm gone." Dean paused when he could have sworn he'd seen Sam flinch. He waited for a bigger reaction but when nothing happened he continued taking to no one, "I have to keep you safe. This is the only way I can think to do it. Just… Just don't go getting into any trouble while I'm gone. I'll be back before you know it."

Dean smiled down at his little brother before he found the strength in himself to get himself to his feet and let go of his brother's hand. As Dean stood in the doorway he watched his brother sleep realizing for the first time in a while that he was actually shivering. He knew then that he needed to go. He needed everything possible to be done for his brother.

He left the room and closed the door for the first time of that entire night. He didn't want anyone other than Marie to be coming in and out, not while he wasn't there.

"Marie." He called out gently. Marie turned around and smiled at him with sympathy.

"Don't worry, Dean. No one will go in that room except for me." She said. Dean nodded and wasn't sure why he believed her because he knew he probably shouldn't.

He left the shelter and entered back into the ruthless cold. But he acted like he had before. He pushed the discomfort behind him and forced himself to toughen up in order to do what he needed to do – save his brother.

The snow was a little less then knee deep, which made every step an energy-draining task. Marie had given him directions before he left and as far as he was concerned he was following them perfectly. Pretty soon he started seeing the miracle like hospital signs. He was getting close. Maybe he wouldn't fail his brother completely.

- - - - - - -

Marie had been keeping an extremely close eye on Sam's room. She hadn't gone in yet so she wouldn't wake him, but the door was closed and no one had gone in. There was only the one entrance to the room and from her position in the main room she had kept on eye on it. She didn't really feel the need to worry, she doubted anyone would try and go in there. But since she had promised Dean she'd keep on eye on it, she did.

She had a lot of other guests to take care of too. Before Dean had gone she'd asked him if he could get two ambulances, but she stressed only if he could. There were a few other people who could use some medical attention, but they could wait. The most serious was Sam.

She only took her eyes of the room for maybe five minutes when she saw some kids having trouble unfolding and putting the sheets on a cot. Once she had finished helping them she quickly moved back to the spot where she could watch both the door and the other room and when she got there she couldn't believe it.

The door to the room Sam was in was cracked slightly open. She tilted her had slightly to the right and made her way over there slowly. Standing inside over Sam was an unfamiliar figure.

"Hey!" Marie said quietly but with as much sting as if she was yelling.

The figure turned around and stared at Marie. It yawned dramatically and let out a simple, "Yes?"

Marie scrunched her eyebrows together wondering what planet this person was on and the said, "Who are you?"

"I'm Lourie… Who are you?" she said.

Marie couldn't believe she was having this conversation here and quickly said, "I'm Marie and I run this place. Now you can't be in here." Marie was quiet because she had to get the other woman out of this room as quickly as she could without being loud so Sam wouldn't be awoken.

"I can be where ever I _please_. I'm not like the _other_ people here." Lourie said as she turned around to face Sam again.

"Wait-" Marie said quickly as she reached to grab Lourie's arm and drag her out if she had to. She couldn't be in the room with Sam and _definitely _couldn't be hovering over him like that. Marie graved Lourie's shoulder and pulled her around to face her.

"I cannot believe you would touch me!" Lourie suddenly burst out.

Marie's facial expression quickly turned from impatient to outraged She couldn't believe what she was hearing or mostly that she was even hearing it. Before she had a chance to respond she heard a soft moaning coming from the couch, she looked down in horror to see Sam's eyes searching around confused and fearful. He made a small whimpering noise that worried Marie and she quickly bent down and put a hand on his shoulder to attempt to comfort him.

"Pathetic." She heard the cruel woman still standing whisper, "_My_ son would _never_-"

Marie shot her eyes up in Lourie's direction, her gaze powerful enough to kill as she whispered, "Get the hell out, now."

Lourie's eyes widened before she settled for a proud expression as she said, "Fine. I don't know why I'm in here anyway. That boy might make me ill…"

Marie's attention wasn't even on Lourie anymore, which only angered the stuck up woman more. She flipped her hair and exited in a predictably dramatic way, with a slam of the door behind her. Marie continued to stroke Sam's shoulder as she struggled to catch his breath and calm himself.

"Shhh Sam, go back to sleep everything's fine." She encouraged lightly.

Sam shook his head a little and said, "D-de-ean?"

The older woman didn't know how to respond at first but then whispered, "He went out to get help Sam, he's gonna be back really soon. Just-"

"N-no-o-o… N-noooo… He c-can-n't th-they'l-l g-get 'im…"he whispered brokenly in fear that something or more likely some_one_ would hurt his big brother while he was here unable to do anything.

Marie shook her head, "Don't you worry, Sam. Dean's gonna be fine. Just sleep, ok? Just sleep…"

Sam continued to shack his head and try to stutter out Dean's name before sleep had the chance to claim him. Marie was stroking his head now in an almost motherly way and he was fighting as hard as he could to start coherent and aware. His attempts were futile as sleep came as a slightly cold blanket pulling him into nothingness except cold.

- - - - - - -

After Marie had gotten Sam back to sleep she left the room and slowly closed the door again, cautious not to wake him. She breathed a sigh of relief and made her way back to her seat. She barely noticed the new resident in the room was a young man about Dean's age who was talking to Lourie.

She realized that they had run out of water bottles for the table and got up to go to the pantry that wasn't too far from Sam's door. She continued to watch it as she got a few bottles out and a few other things they needed.

Meanwhile in the room Lourie hugged her son, extremely happy to have some one of her level to converse with. She gave him two sloppy kisses on each cheek leveling behind traces of her lipstick and motion for him to have a seat on the cot she had claimed for herself.

"Oh dear, you have no _idea_ the nightmare of a night I've had. I can't believe I'm here of all places…" she complained.

"What I don't understand is how you got here..?" Mike questioned

"Well, I was walking home from Martha's house even though I knew when I saw the snow I should have stayed there and when I realized how horrible it was getting I got inside here. I sat here for hours with no one with half our intelligence to talk to. Then finally I went to talk to this boy about your age who was watching over his brother. Poor boy was pretty banged up…" Marie slowed, not thinking Mike would have any interest in the rest.

He surprised her when he suddenly asked, "A boy? How was his brother banged up?" Lourie looked up and saw the familiar twinkle of evil in his eye, which she of course mistook for genuine worry.

"Ohh, he was shivering an bruised all over, his name was… Stan? No, Sam I think. Yes, his name was Sam."

Mike tried to hide his surprise as he looked down at his folded hands, slightly disappointed that if his brother were here it would be hard to finish what he started.

"Where is he?"

Lourie paid no attention to her son's strange questions and simply answered, "He's in that back room over there. I was in there earlier, the brother went out to get help, but that crazy woman Maire or something, has been watching him like a hawk! Can you believe she asked me to _leave?_"

Mike's expression changed from disappointed to hopeful and he quickly asked, "Which woman? Where is she?"

Lourie pointed to the hallway and said, "She just left she's somewhere in that hallway."

Mike swallowed and said, "How about… I go talk to her; maybe I could go in and watch out for the kid… He could use someone his age to keep him company…"

Lourie smiled at her son placed a hand on his cheek, "You're such a good boy, Mikey. Such a good boy."

He smiled at his mother before standing up and walking to the hallway. There he saw Marie with her head buried in the pantry trying to find something in the back. He smiled to himself, this woman would be easy.

He walked over to her and politely tapped on her shoulder.

Marie turned around quickly and looked at the young man up and down before asking, "Can I help you?"

Mike smiled and nodded and said, "Yes, are you Maire?"

Marie nodded and said, "Yes, wha-"

Before she had a chance to finish her response Mike had already graved her mouth and neck and pushed her hands behind her. She struggled but Mike was strong, wanting to do this quietly, he slowly forced her into the deep pantry and closed the door. Once they were in he slammed her head into the wall Marie lost consciousness right away and Mike laid her down on the floor as not to make anymore noise.

Once he was done he walked out of the pantry and closed the door behind him. He walked back to the big room happy to see that no one seemed to have noticed. He silently thanked the loud children, battery operated radio and guests that didn't seem to care. He winked at his mom and received a smile from her before he turned back to the door, the only thing shielding Sam and slowly opened it. His smile grew when he saw Sam lying there with no one to protect him and slammed the door behind him. And noticed Sam beginning to wake and moan. He locked the door and strode over to the helpless hunter. He ripped the blankets and jackets from him in one swift motion and that was it for Sam. His eyes shot open and saw his nightmares playing in front of him, in real time and color.

"N-n-no y-y-ou-u c-can-n't b-be… p-ple-ase-e…" Sam begged mentally pinching himself over and over. This was real. This was no dream.

Mike smiled and ripped off his own belt and said, "Don't worry, Sammy. The waits over. Let's finish this."

- - - - - - -

A/N: Sorry I think there were a lot of typos but I'm tired and really sick of this chapter so ya… Please review! And thank you to everyone that did for the last chapter thanks sooo much : )


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Sorry about taking so long to update I really hope you all like this chapter. I found this one so hard to write, I knew it was coming so that's probably why I kept putting off writing this but I really hope you like it

CHAPTER FIVE

Sam blinked. He blinked twice. He blinked twenty times, imagining that when his eyes opened again there wouldn't be his worst nightmare in the form of a twenty something year old man hovering over him. A man about to break him once and for all.

He was smiling. There was a glimmer of twisted happiness playing across his over-excited features. Sam watched his eyes that looked as though they were all pupil, and every time they traced over Sam's form he felt himself shudder.

The hunter noticed right away when his shirt was being cut open via a pair of medical scissors sitting in the first aid kit next to him.

"P-p-le-ase-e," Sam stuttered.

Mike nearly laughed before savagely ripping the shirt from Sam's body. The battered figure that was Sam instinctively tried to cover his body from Mike's prying eyes with his arms, but Mike just forced them to his sides and assessed Sam's state. He smiled at his work recognizing the cuts and bruises that he had marked him with. It took less than seconds to realize Mike's head was slowly leaning over Sam and licking his stomach. The memories raced back and shot through his head like lightening. Image after image. Feeling after horrible feeling. There was no stop to it. Sam moaned and gave all he had to roll away. He pulled weakly, struggling breathlessly to save himself; since it was obvious there was no one around to help him out this time.

"No, no, no… You're not getting away, Sam. We're going to finish this. Whether you like it or not."

The salty words breathed on Sam's neck made him gag. He pushed weakly a couple more times and then blinked a billion worthless blinks. Neither did anything.

"Come on now… You know we can have fun…"

Sam's sobs shook him as he struggled to get them up his throat. Mike was kissing him everywhere. His chest, his stomach. There were trails of spit from the top of his neck to the bottom of his torso and Sam was helpless to stop it. Begging did nothing. Sobbing did nothing. Praying and blinking and dying little by little only made every second all the more the worse.

He felt a warm hand clutch his thigh and Sam's breathing quickened. Now the only noises that left his lips were small meaningless whimpers. The hand moved and began rubbing it's way up his leg and around his ass, now hard enough to hurt. His hands stopped just around the waist of Sam's sweat pants and began to gently pull them down.

"N-no-o… No… n-no… no… no…" he whispered more to himself than to the evil body draped over him.

His pleas were pointless because by the time the last one had been said Sam was laying there a shivering naked form. He didn't realize at first but when he did he wondered if that would be the last breath he took before he never breathed again. His throat was closing up, he was sure of it. His vision was blurring and almost gone from all the tears. It hadn't gone this far last time. And he never thought he would think this but the only words flashing in neon color in his head were _'Where's that guy from before? Where's Tim? Where's Marie? Dad? Mom? Dean? Oh god, where's Dean..?_

Sam heard Mike moan or groan or something of that fashion and tried his hardest to block him out. He glanced down for a split-second only to realize that Mike was doing horrible things to him. Things that weren't aloud to be shown on prime time television. Things that made him gag and want to die. All Sam could even think of wanting was death.

His heart was beating out of his chest; Mike's mouth was roaming over places he could never mention out loud. And in between all the chaos Sam realized. He realized his nightmare only getting worse.

"I knew you liked it, Sammy. Stop lying to yourself…"

Sam didn't know what he meant at first but then realized that his body was betraying him. He mouthed silent 'No's that only fell on deaf ears. No. He didn't enjoy it. He didn't want it. God, he didn't want it.

There was a cloud of hair in his face and he was almost thankful he had a distorted vision of the scene happening all around him. The scene that belonged in a horror movie that actually turned out to be his life. He continued to sob uncontrollably, his face drowning in an ocean of tears and hurt. He didn't notice that Mike was now also completely undressed, that he was throwing himself over Sam's body to fulfill his own wants.

Sam noticed something was quickening, he knew that Mike was doing something worse than before, but Sam closed his eyes and silently chanted to himself _'I'm not here, I'm not here. Wake up dammit! Wake up you idiot!'_

Sam suddenly felt two hands grip his sides and call out his name. Sam's eyes opened in surprise and hope. It was Dean. It had to be Dean calling him.

Sam was wrong.

There he was, that monster. That sick, evil, sweaty man. There he was staring down at Sam, his eyes now looking red with flames, or they did to Sam at least.

"Your gonna like this, Sammy. You're noting gonna be able to ignore me now."

Sam's closed eyes opened slightly in confusion. He wondered what he could do worse. What he could do now to rob him of his body even more.

But Sam knew the answer quick, real quick. The clue? Mike standing up next to him, take the weak hunter's shoulders into his hand and flipping him over in one swift movement.

Sam felt his ribs crack and go the wrong way and moaned in pain. After he had gotten some control over his extreme agony it took seconds to register in his head what was happening and when he did he scrambled to get away, but there was something holding him down. Mike was sitting on his thighs by now getting ready to do the worst.

A million thoughts ran on high speed across his brain. Even with all the horrible things that had happened minutes before, he knew that eventually he'd find a way to deal. His brother could help him and then eventually he'd be able to go back to normal. He had some optimism, even after everything that had, happened. But with what was happening now? He knew the second he felt Mike leaning over him he'd never be able to get over this. This was going too far.

He screamed a million pleas in his head. He prayed a million half a second long prayers. He promised god he'd do anything, just don't let this happen. His head was pushed in the couch beneath him; he had to move his head to the side just to be able to breath. He'd forgotten about trying to control his hysteria a long time ago.

After Sam felt this extreme agonizing pain he knew he'd never forget as long as he lived, everything began to blur. Was he passing out? Was he dying?

The pain only got worse and everything just blurred more and more. The colors around him blending together to make one watercolor painting he didn't want to see.

Sam knew it then and even admitted it to himself. Mike was inside him. He was in pain. He was probably bleeding.

And this last part took longest to admit. He blinked one more time, holding his eyes shut for seconds trying his best to block out Mike's panting breaths mixed in with pleasured moans.

He opened his eyes and admitted it: this was really happening.

That's about when he closed his eyes and gave up.

(Ok I was originally going to leave it there. But I thought I might get killed or lots of hateful PM's lol. And since I got so many reviews I couldn't just give one cheapy three page review, so I'll continue. Just imagine you had to wait until I found time to review to read the next part lol. And btw how am I 'lol-ing' after what I just did to Sammy! Not-lol)

- - - - - - -

This, ladies and gentlemen was a true miracle. Dean turned a corner and saw it. The hospital. There was almost an angelic glow around it as he ran closer and closer to it. Once the door handle was in his arm reach he literally collapsed in the door with exhaustion.

Everyone turned to look at him and he let out what seemed to be an exaggerated breath, even though it really was ligidement. He looked around for half a second before saying "Please… My brother… I need an ambulance or something…"

The hospital staff was quick to react calling in a few EMT's from the back. One male EMT rushed over to him and began to lead him to the door. The EMT suggested his stay here and get some treatment, because apparently, he didn't look so good himself. Dean didn't even take the second to consider this idea. He just said a firm 'No way' and made the man nod before they ran out into the freezing cold in search of an ambulance. He told the man that he needed two because there was more than one person hurt. One came, siren on and all to the front and Dean was quickly whisked into the front seat while the driver of the ambulance jumped out and ran to the back with a female EMT. The one that had been with him before jumped into the drivers seat and they were quickly on their way. The EMT told him the other one would follow their siren and Dean nodded, not really sure if he cared.

"Where is he/" the EMT asked.

"Down this road." Dean said in monotone, his eyes darting from side to side, not wanting to miss the turn.

"What's wrong with him?" the EMT quietly asked.

Dean looked over at the driver for a second and then responded, "He was out in the cold for a while. Some one beat him up, I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure his ribs are broken, and he has a cut on his side that looked like it could get in infected. But he hasn't warmed up, he's still really cold and shaking constantly."

"Has he been awake?" the man asked. 

"Yeah." Dean said quickly.

"That's good."

"Just one or two more blocks up…" Dean said quietly.

"You walked all the way from down here?" The EMT asked.

"Well, yeah." Dean said quietly, not really wanting to talk.

"Your brother's lucky to have someone like you." He said quietly

Dean laughed inwardly and thought,_ 'I wish that was true.'_

The EMT continued to drive and came to a screeching halt when Dean screamed out 'Here!'

Dean was the first one out of the ambulance. His black boots quickly making contact with the semi-deep snow. He quickly ran to the door and threw it open guessing to see Marie or someone there. There was no one.

"Marie!" Dean called out, slightly worried.

Dean heard a muffled yell from somewhere and called out the name again, his facial expression quickly changing from a little worried to really, really worried. He heard the yell again and then realized it was coming from down the hall. He quickly ran down the hall, ignoring the looks he was getting from the other guests and the glare she received from Laurie. Once she was down the hall she realized the yelling was coming from the closet and the person inside was also banding on the door.

Dean yelled to stand back and he quickly kicked open the door to see Marie standing there was a big bump on the side of her face. Her face was stained with tears and ruined make-up and she sighed deeply at the sight of Dean.

"Dean! Thank god!" she said.

"Where's Sam?" he asked with a very big 'No crap' attitude.

"Dean-"

"Where the hell is Sam!" he demanded, Marie flinched and could already see the guilt rushing up and welling into his eyes.

"He's in the room I think."

Dean didn't have time to freak over the 'I think' and quickly ran to the room. His hand connected with the doorknob but the door wouldn't budge.

"Sam! God, Sammy!" Dean yelled.

Dean didn't notice the EMT's and crowd of people all behind him one hundred percent of his attention was on opening that door. He heard someone moving inside and doubted it was his brother so he raised his foot and attempted to kick the door open. At first it stayed shut but as his anger rose, so did his strength and the door suddenly ripped open and came close to snapping off from the hinges.

That's when he saw it. The face of evil. Mike was dressed in clothes that looked like they had been thrown on him and he was climbing out the window. Dean was quick to react and before even noticing Sam's state, whipped out his gun and shot at Mike. Blood splattered all over the wall as Dean's bullet connected with his foot. It barely slowed him down because seconds later Mike was gone. Dean went to run after him at first, his anger flaring, but then look over to the right and saw his brother.

"No, no, no, no, no, no Oh god, Sammy. Please, no," Dean said out loud, babbling on in disbelief.

Sam lay curled up on the couch, his back to Dean. He was shaking violently, beyond anything Dean had seen before. There was blood everywhere and worst of all he was completely naked. Dean glared at Marie and she quickly closed the door in order to give Sam some dignity.

Dean ran over to Sam's side and whispered, "Sammy," he reached down to place a hand on his shoulder, but as soon as he met Sam's battered skin Sam whimpered and flinched noticeably. Dean saw his curl in more and Dean bent down next to him, the tears running down his cheeks and upon inspecting his brother he realized the blood covering his chest. Dean's save Sammy mode and turned him over despite his protests. There to Dean's horror was a wound quickly over flowing with blood and the pair of scissors being gripping in Sam's shaking fingers.

That's about when Dean almost gave up too.

A/N: Please review and thanks sooo much for all the reviews before!!!! Mike will be getting his but I knew it couldn't be here because if it was with everyone around it would be too quick. I know no one wants this but don't worry he's not getting away : ))


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: OMG! I am so sorry that I haven't updated in TWO MONTHS. This is what happened: One day I sat down, ready to upload this chapter about a month and two weeks ago, when I realized I couldn't sign on to my account. I tried signing onto other websites like Facebook and myspace even AOL and NONE of them worked. For this entire time I haven't been able to sign on or do anything. Finally I took my laptop to a mac store and they told me something was wrong with my internet I had to leave it there over night while they fixed it. I don't even know what was wrong with it, some virus or something I have no idea but now I'll be updating this and all my fics much more often. Again I'm so sorry, you don't know how close I came to breaking this computer in half and I had no other computer to use arghhhh I hope you enjoy this chapter and THANK YOU SOOO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS you guys are amazing!

- - - -

CHAPTER SIX

But Dean didn't give up. He almost gave up.

There was this little flicker of hope left inside of him, and somewhere in the distance he heard the steady chanting of his father.

'_We never give up on family.'_

'_You look out for Sammy. Understood?'_

'_Sammy.'_

'_Take care of Sammy.'_

'_Take care of your brother, Dean.'_

His brother needed him. That meant he would have to give up or break down another time, not while the most important life hung in the balance.

The guilt-ridden hunter slowly reached for the pair of scissors in his brother's hand and was floored when Sammy flinched them away, burying them deeper into himself. Dean's second attempt to take the dangerous object was futile as Sam loosened his grip on the weapon momentarily, just long enough for them to slip open. When Dean tried to take them from his brother again, Sam's nerves took hold as he quickly pulled them away, scraping his cheek with them in the process.

A tear rolled down Dean's cheek as he whispered, "Please, Sam. Please let them go. Let go of them… Please let go."

It took a few minutes before what Dean was asking seemed to register in Sam's head, but when it did he loosened his grip on the mocking object. Dean quickly snatched it and through it across the room.

It looked as though Sam was uncurling himself little by little and Dean took this as a good sign. Maybe he was realizing who it was.

His hopes were quickly dismissed when he saw Sam's hopeless eyes staring at him through watery layers. He said nothing at first, just stared – his eyes unseeing.

The older brother wasn't sure how to react, so he slowly placed a hand on Sam's chest, mostly to study his pattern of breathing. That was when Sam's nervous and unknowing hand griped his wrist. Dean's eyes shot up to look into Sam's, and for the first time Sam saw something. However, what he saw made for Dean's worst nightmare.

"j-j-ju-s-s-t… d-d-o-o I-it… N-no-o m-m-o-r-re p-pa-in…"

Dean watched his brother in horror as he saw the small stutters leave his lips and as tears overflowed from his eyes. Dean barely noticed Sam moving Dean's hand down towards the place Sam assumed Dean wanted it to be.

That when Dean pulled his hand away as quickly as he could and as a result toppled backwards onto the floor. Dean continued to back himself away on shaking limps, trying to control his utter horror.

It took a few seconds for the reason Sam had done such a thing to register but once they did it was clear what Sam's motivation to do something like that would be. Sam probably had thought that Dean was about to hurt him in order for him to rape him again. Sam had given in, and that was more than Dean could take.

Strong, forceful tears rolled down like waterfalls from both their eyes and Dean slowly stood up and put his hand on Sam's head, both their faces scrunching up to control the tears.

"No, no little brother. Never again, ok? No one will ever hurt you again. I'll never let you get hurt again." Dean continued smoothing Sam's hair. Sam continued to shake his head as if trying to shake off the nightmares, but Dean's continuous shushing and soothing touch calmed him.

- - - - - - -

Sam had heard the bang on the door.

He'd felt the evil in the room leave with a gunshot.

But even though it was gone he still felt the need to protect himself, to do anything. His frozen fingers searched the table next to his head and quickly fell upon a pair of medical scissors. He pulled them close and closed his eyes tight as tears seeped through the corners.

He soon realized that he didn't want a weapon for protection. He didn't need to use this stupid pair of scissors on someone else. The only one that he could even think to use them on was himself.

First thought was go for the wrists, but then realized that would take time. He quickly opened the pair of scissors slightly before plunging it into his own chest. The grunt barely if at all audible behind the sound of his shivering body. He went to do it a second time when he felt a warm hand touch his chilled body.

Sam flinched, unsure of what to do in this situation. Mike was warm. He had known how Mike felt all too well and couldn't even try to erase it from his mind. It was impossible.

He curled in on himself, desperate to keep himself warm as he felt blood leave his veins. The hand didn't leave though. It stood. It taunted him.

Sam was pretty sure that pathetic whimpering noise was coming from his own mouth, but still couldn't find a way to admit it. Some where deep in his sub-conscious Sam was well aware that the voice calling out his name and the word "No" over and over was that of his own brother, but those thoughts were sinking deep enough.

The only words he really heard was "Please let go" and Sam connected immediately.

'Just let go… It must be an angel it must be god whispering to just go to him. It sounds like an angle… It sounds like someone who cares…'

Sam's panic slowly drifted to calm and didn't even recognize that before in his alarm had scraped himself with the sharp edge a couple more times. Before he knew it his weapon was gone. His only defense against that warm hand had been taken away. Now the hand moved down to his chest, and Sam felt panic set in. He was going to do it again, wasn't he? He was going to take it by force, just like he had before. Sam couldn't handle that, not again.

A million thoughts flashed through his mind as his palm quickly connected and wrapped around a wrist. Mike's wrist? It had to be.

Suddenly the intentions of Mike's hand set in. He was going to punch him again. He was going to hurt him even more in order to make him unable to even attempt to fight back. Sam didn't want the pain, he couldn't take it, so he did the only thing he could think of and just let him take it.

But when he tried to do what he thought would work, the hand suddenly left and now Sam really panicked. Mike didn't want to just take it, he wanted Sam to hurt, he wanted him to feel the pain of his fists pounding into him. He wanted Sam to feel open palms around his neck, cutting off his breathing forever. That was all he wanted.

But even in the horror of the moment, the moment when it was all going to happen again the angel's whispers grew louder playing on a much high volume than the fear. The voice was comfort; it was everything and the only thing he needed.

And right before everything faded to black he was sure he heard angels singing. He heard the angel whispering, 'It's gonna be ok.'

- - - - - - -

"It's gonna be ok." Dean whispered as he felt Sam's body calm beneath him. Dean threw a blanket over his brother's naked from as he smoothed some hair from his face.

Marie had already gathered some of Sam's clothes and handed it to Dean. She tried to hold Dean's eyesight, let him know that he wasn't alone in this, but he wouldn't look away from his brother's face. He stared mesmerizingly at his brother's closed puppy dog eyes, unable to look at anything else.

Dean silently began dressing his brother; He wasn't about to send him out in front of all those people like this, a mess. He wasn't about to let them all look down upon him and now what happened to him – know what Dean let happen.

Sam whimpered a few times in his sleep, but Dean barely noticed, he tried his best to block everything out just long enough to get his brother to the ambulance where they could help him.

Once Sam was dressed Dean piled a couple blankets over him, but it still did not make the shivering cease. Marie walked to the door and let the paramedics in. Through the doorway she glared at every last guest in the house trying to get a glimpse inside. Most backed away, but the ones that didn't got a solid door slammed in their face.

The loaded Sam onto a gurney that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere and quickly wheeled him out. Marie walked outside the door again to scream, "Move out of the way!" so loudly it shook the house.

But it still didn't wake Sam from his almost too deep sleep.

Dean had found comfort in holding his brother's hand, and tried to keep up with them as they sped up faster. When they reached the door to the freezing world outside they stopped and wrapped Sam up as much as they could before venturing outside.

Getting Sam down the stairs proved to be an obstacle, partly because he seemed almost too big for the gurney. Once he was down on the floor, and the snow covered the wheels, Dean realized the path in the snow another one of the paramedics had been making. They got Sam into the ambulance relatively quickly, and Dean just stood there staring.

"Would you like to ride in the back with your brother?"

Dean spun around to see the paramedic he's been talking to before staring at him, waiting for a response. Dean just nodded simply and so did the paramedic. The older brother climbed in next to Sam and hesitantly looked down at him. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Sam like this. He just laid there on that gurney, eyes closed, while all these strangers circled around him. All of them able to do more for him than his own brother.

He awkwardly made his way to an empty seat that had been made available for him and watched as they helped his brother.

As all the medics began to circle around his brother everything began to blur from tears. He sat there blank faced, petrified by the fact that he could do nothing. That he was sure he had done nothing.

It seemed like in no time they pulled into the hospital and they were taking Sam away. Dean snapped out of his trance and ran after them as they rolled his brother away from him

"No, no, no slow down!" Dean called after them after they had ran through the hospital doors.

A woman suddenly appeared in front of him and placed a hand on his chest stopping him from going any further. So looked at him sternly and then said, "May I help you, sir?"

Dean didn't hesitate and quickly said, "That's my brother I need to go with him."

The woman took a deep breath and said, "I'm sorry sir, you cannot go any further, and your brother is in good hands. How about you just have a seat-"

"No! I need to go with Sam… I can't…"

"Sir, please. Just fill out-"

Dean snatched the clipboard from his hand and finished for her, "These papers! Of course what else would you people want me to do,"

He sat down and quickly began filling out the all too familiar tedious forms when he heard someone call out for extra help. A few nurses quickly ran over and Dean through the clipboard over and ran to see what was happening and sure enough there was Sam.

About 4 nurses were circled around him trying to hold him down to the gurney as he fought desperately to get away from all of them. Dean could hear his whimpers from down the hall and he quickly started to try and get to his brother when the same woman appeared in front of him again.

"Sir stand back they have it under control." She said holding him back.

Dean glared at the woman with such fire in his eyes it looked like he was about to grab her and throw her to the floor, regardless of the fact she was a woman.

"No he needs me, I'm the only one that can calm him down!" Dean said loudly.

Dean watched as one of the nurses pulled out a long scary looking syringe filled with a clear medicine. Dean reacted quickly by pushing the woman aside and running to his brother. He may not have been able to save him from much before, but he could save him right now.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: **Hey I hope you guys had a great New year and holiday and stuff : )) I few people pm-ed me wanting to know when an update was coming so I decided to take this day and and write it lol. Hope you guys enjoy!!!

**- - - - - -**

**7**

"Sir I have to respectfully ask you to-"

Dean had pushed his way through the makeshift barricade of nurses and security guards. Now he stood inches away from his terrified brother, a look of sheer horror in both of their eyes. It was taking four people to hold down his panicked brother, one taking each limb in an attempt to hold him still. He fought them tooth and nail, using all of his strength and physical advantage actually managing to throw the girl holding down his right arm to the side.

But even as he fought he knew it was just temporary. It wouldn't be soon until his lost his strength and gave in to what ever these arms wanted him to do. Even as he persevered he felt hopeless, helpless.

Dean knew all this just by looking at his brothers expression, simply because he knew him.

Dean looked directly in the eyes of the man standing in the way between him and his brother and said, "I'm not 'stepping aside'. And I am not going to let you inject my brother with your poison…" he took a breath and tried to ignore his brother's whimpers just this once and finished, "I can calm him down just let me go to him."

The man looked at Dean trying to find his true motives, but found none other than the ones he spoke of. Even before the man had the chance to step out of Dean way, Dean had already pushed through and was holding Sam's free arm.

Instead of restraining his brother he tried to follow his brother's arm and control it as it frantically swung around aimlessly. He did this while he gently rubbed Sam's wrist and make endless nonsense noises that were slowly helping Sam to relax.

"Shhhh… Shh… Hey… Hey I got'cha…" Dean whispered, now desperate to calm him down completely before the hospital staff lost its patience.

Sam lay there on the gurney, his legs now free of people trying to hold him down. Someone called out, "We have to keep moving," and the gurney slowly started to roll down the hall, Dean walking along with it. As much as Sam tried to figure out what was happening he couldn't for the life of him grasp it. All he knew was he was somewhere surrounded by a lot of people and someone who cared about him was holding his arm trying to calm him down.

Dean watched as Sam started to shake and curl his long legs up towards his chest. He shifted to his side and let his eyes fall closed, as tears rimmed the edges. He was making a whimpering sound before every intake of breath. He resembled more of a wounded animal than a 6'4 23 year old man.

Sam now had a vice like grip on Dean's arm and Dean had the same on Sam's.

"It's ok Sammy… It's all gonna be ok, they're gonna take care of you so you need to trust them, just a little bit, ok?"

Maybe days or maybe a couple of minutes later Sam felt the comfort being ripped away from him and yelling in the background as the person who was administering that comfort was forced away. Sam almost panicked but tried to focus on the words that had been left with him. Someone had just told him to trust the people around him and the second he realized it had been Dean he drifted of to sleep.

- - - - - - -

It had been a half an hour of forums and an hour of waiting and still Dean sat in the same chair in the waiting room. Sam had been out of his sight for an hour and a half and that was unacceptable, especially under the circumstances.

When Dean had finished those forums he had figured it would mean his brother would be done. He had imagined it like he pushed the forums along with their latest fake insurance card into a slot and out would come his brother, good as new.

But Dean had been to enough hospitals to know that never happened.

It was an hour of flipping through Men's Health magazines and worthless issues of TIME. It was an hour of hospital sounds and sliding gurneys. Of people, actually people rolling through the sliding door frozen solid. _People _frozen solid, like ice cubes.

It was an hour of checking his watch and double-checking with the secretary. And then suddenly, like the hour and a half and restless waiting had never been a woman approached Dean with an, "Are you Dean Matthews?"

Dean stood up quickly, leaving the imprint of his backside behind and said, "Yes I am."

The man nodded, and Dean picked up a touch of pity in his body language. Pity that Dean did not want or care for. The man pulled out a clipboard and look it over for what seemed like year and right before he spoke again Dean was about ready to rip it out of his hands and smack him with it.

"I'm Dr. Perez, I'm your brother's doctor, do you mind if I talk to you about Sam's injuries?" the doctor stated calmly.

Dean stared at the woman, a sudden burst of rage sweeping through him. Of course he wanted to hear about Sam's injuries! Was this woman stupid? Did Sam have an idiot for a doctor- "Please… is Sam ok?"

The doctor dropped her arms and let the clipboard all out of Dean's sight and said, "Your brother came in here with extreme hypothermia. We saw that you were able to bind his ribs, which probably stopped a rib from puncturing a lung, so good work… He had one broken rib, and two cracked so he'll be sore for a while. He also had numerous abrasions that have been treated and cared for… The one in particular on his chest needed two stitches. But in addition to those injuries there's something else…" the doctor stopped and waited for Dean to signal for her to say the rest. Dean tried to stay stone-faced, not wanting to show emotion as he whispered, 'what?' like he didn't even know. The doctor sighed and continued with her explanation, "We found evidence of sexual assault… he had internal injuries and… tears that are being treated. There was much bruising on his inner thighs and on his hips…" the doctor noticed Dean's body slump a little as if in defeat and she finished with, "I'm very sorry Mr. Matthews."

Dean nodded and tried to brush off the emotional blow by asking, "Umm… so … are you running…"

"Yes we are running tests for HIV infection and other STD's… What happened, Mr. Matthews?"

Dean sighed and suddenly found he explaining the entire story to this doctor, not looking her in the eye once. He seemed to have forgotten that his brother was somewhere else in the hospital getting tested for sexually transmitted diseases and Dean was standing here telling the days events to some stranger.

"I'm sure your brother doesn't blame you, Mr. Matthews, you seemed to have done all you could." She offered.

Dean shook his head and said, "Can I see him?"

She nodded and began walking, Dean quickly followed next to her, "Your brother was sleeping the last time I went in there. He had been awake while we warmed him up and got him into his room. He spoke to no one, just stared ahead. I tried to ask him how he was feeling but all he said was your name… this way."

The doctor motioned them to turn left down another long hallway and Dean asked, "My name?"

"Yes he said, 'Dean' and when I asked who Dean was he just said, 'Brother.' And fell asleep. Now this was about twenty minutes ago so he may be awake but if he isn't he's resting so let him have some sleep. If he wakes up while you're in there just keep him calm and call me in so I can check up on him, ok? This is his room."

They stopped in front of and she lifted a small hand to open the door slowly why making a 'shh' sign with her finger. The two of them quietly stepped through the door expecting to find Sam asleep on the hospital bed but when they walked in found him differently.

Sam was lying there surrounded by machines that all made their own individual beeps and noises. His eyes were open as he stared blankly ahead, not even turning at the sound of the new arrivals in the room.

"Sam." Dean whispered. Sam looked like a cleaned up mess. All of the wounds and bruises but now all the blood and tears were clean from his face. Bandages created a mask around him as if trying to keep the world from know his true state.

Sam didn't look up when Dean called his name. He didn't even acknowledge his brother, just continued to stare ahead. He was wrapped up in a silent pain – the worst kind.

"Sam." Dean repeated, hoping that maybe Sam just hadn't heard him. But Sam didn't even flinch, didn't even blink. He looked over at the doctor but she carried no explanation, "Could I have a minute alone with him?"

The doctor nodded, "Sure."

Dean slowly closed the door behind her and looked at his brother from across the room before taking some hesitant steps towards him, "Sam, it's me, Dean."

Sam stayed blank and expressionless. Dean walked around the bed and took a chair, moving it closer to Sam's side. The reached out to take Sam's hand into his but then stopped short. He wasn't sure if San wanted to be touched right now.

"What are you ignoring me? Last I heard you were asking for me…" Dean said trying to lighten up his brother. Sam was clearly wide-awake but he seemed to be in a trace or asleep. Dean silently hoped it was one of the two, if Sam was shutting him out like this it probably meant that he was dealing with this situation in a horrible way.

"I'm here now. And I'm not going anywhere. So if you want to say something I'll listen…" Dean looked Sam over again, "I'm not going anywhere, Sam. And I'll be here when you have something to say, if you want… Just whatever you want to do, Sammy."

They sat in silence for at least ten minutes. Sam staring ahead, Dean staring down at the bed sheet, glancing up at Sam every so often. Dean felt tears stinging the back of his eyes but forced them back with everything he had. He wouldn't let Sam see him cry, not now. Not when all he needed was hope.

"God, this is all my fault…" Dean whispered brokenly. He gasped and stared down at his feet his mouth open worthlessly since no words came out. He looked up and Sam and whispered, "Come on Sammy, please say something. I know you can hear me and we can talk about the hard stuff later but just let me know you can here me sitting her being a dork," he chuckled lightly and looked up, "Please."

His hand slowly inched closer to Sam's and he whispered his brother's name once before he touched his limp hand and the second they made that contact everything seemed to go to hell.

Well, more than it already had.

Sam gasped loudly at the spec of physical contact and pulled his arms away and into himself. He pulled his legs up too and wrapped himself into a tight ball. Dean moved back too genuinely startled by his brother's drastic movements. He watched as his brother's blood pressure soared as he panicked. The whimpering noise had returned to his brother as both brothers tried to calm Sam down.

"Sam calm down. Sam you have to calm down, please. Everything's fine…" Dean said. He stood up and pressed the call button over and over trying to get anyone's attention.

A storm of hospital staff flooded in through the door and to his brother. Sam only got more terrified by all the people and began rocking himself trying to calm down. The room was a mess of yelling and walkie-talkie calls to other doctors. Everyone unsure of what to do.

The doctor Dean had spoken to before came running through the door and approached Dean, "Dean I think it's best we sedate your brother just this once. If you can't calm him down I'm sure none of these doctors can and he is too nervous right now."

Dean looked at his brother as the room quieted and everyone looked in Sam's direction. Instead of becoming violent like he had before now he was just wrapped up within himself trying his best to relax but it was clear to everyone in the room her needed a little help this time. Dean nodded and stepped back as the sedative came in through the door and was inserted into Sam's IV drip.

The nurses slowly filed out of the room as Dean stepped closer. The sedative was beginning to take affect and Sam had fallen back on the bed, but before he was shoved into unconsciousness he whispered, "De…."

Dean's eyes grew wide as he heard the word he'd been waiting to hear since Dean had seen his brother sitting in that hospital bed, "Yeah, Sammy?" he said.

Sam didn't respond, all he did was fall asleep.

Dean called Sam's name a couple more time but after it finally clicked that his brother was asleep he turned around and punched the wall as hard as he could, making a slight dent in it. The doctor stood back, feeling guilty that she had pressured him to use the sedative.

"I'll be back later to check on him…" she said and left the room.

Dean said nothing just sat back down in the chair next to his brother and waiting for him to wake up again.

- - - - - -

Dean didn't realize how tired he was until he had fallen asleep in that uncomfortable hospital chair and had been awoken by Doctor Perez.

"Mr. Matthews, the town police are here to see you…"

Dean opened his eyes and rubbed them, "Huh?"

She cleared her throat, "The police, they would like to speak with you…"

Dean looked around and realized that he had been using the side of Sam's mattress as a pillow and Sam was still sound asleep next to him. He looked up and saw a police officer standing outside of the room and in the window.

He stood up and made his way to the door and approached the cop.

"Are you Dean Matthews?" the slightly taller man asked.

Dean nodded, "Yes I am, do you want me to-"

"No I don't need you to tell me anything I already know what happened, " he said in a slightly rude voice. He was scribbling something down on his notepad and hadn't even bother to look at Dean once.

Dean raised his eyebrows and said, "Did the doctor-"

"No." he said slapping his notebook shut. Sam flinched a little and the officer continued, "Mr. Spinella did."

Dean was dumbfounded when he asked, "Who?"

The officer shook his head, "Mr. Mike Spinella."

"And who's that?"

The officer rubbed his temple seeming to be annoyed and said, "That's the man you shot, Mr. Matthews."

Dean's eyebrows knitted in confusion and then asked, "Did you arrest him?"

The police officer chucked and said, "Why on earth why I arrest him? You're the one that shot him, there were many witnesses to the event and your lucky he has chosen not to press charges against you."

Dean felt like shaking the stupid out of the man standing before him and couldn't control the rise in his voice as he said, "Me? What are you talking about he's the one that mugged and raped my fucking brother, I was defending him, that's why I shot him. Now you have to arrest him before he does it to someone else!"

The man's face hardened as he looked offended by Dean's words and said, "No we both know that is not true Mr. Matthews, you want to tell me what really happened, or should I just ask your brother?"

He made a move towards the door when Dean put a hand on his chest and pushed him back lightly, "Your not going anywhere near my brother."

"Now boy you listen to me, you dare touch me and I'll arrest you right now for assaulting an officer."

"Why don't you ask Sam's doctor? My brother's sleeping right now." Dean said stepping back. He couldn't afford to get arrested and leave his brother here alone and he also couldn't risk them finding out who he really was.

"I have already spoke to Sam's doctor, there is evidence that he was raped and beaten but the physical evidence they were holding had disappeared. Someone has broken in and take then evidence and I think it was you, you want to confess?"

Dean breathed out loudly trying to control his anger, "Why on earth would I steal the evidence?" then it dawn on Dean, "You're sick… you think I did this to Sam? To my own brother?"

The officer shrugged, " You've been in the hospital and according to a few nurses he called out your name. But to tell you the truth? I don't care what happened to your brother. My concern is citizens of this town – not people passing through."

Dean looked at the man in disgust, "I can't believe this. You're letting a sick rapist out on the streets."

"Trust me if I could I would lock you up just for the hell of it but I've got no evidence. I don't like let's sick sons of bitches out on the street but my hands are tied… But here's what your' gonna do…" he paused and stepped closer to Dean, "As soon as you're brother is released form this hospital you are going to get in your car and drive far away from this town and not come back. Go deal with your family drama somewhere else, but not in my town. Understood?"

"Sure." Dean said taking a step closer himself.

"Thank you for your time," the officer whispered mockingly before shoving him in the shoulder and walking out of the hospital.

Dean looked back into the room and saw that Sam had awoken from the slam against the wall. He went to go back in the room again but he was unable to face him so instead he informed his doctor that he was awake and asked her to direct him to the payphones.

He picked up the phone and dialed the number he knew by heart and after a few rings the person he was calling picked up.

"Hello?" came the gruff answer.

"Bobby, it's Dean…"

"Hey, Dean how's the hunt coming? Any problems?" Bobby waited for Dean to answer but when all he got was a long pause he asked, "Is everything ok? Where's Sam?"

Dean closed his eyes and said, "He's hurt, he was mugged and… He's better now but he won't talk to me… Something happened to him and I don't know I think he's mad at me…" 

"I'm sure he's not mad at you Dean…"

"No he won't talk to me I don't know what to do…" he said slightly louder. He calmed himself and then said, "Bobby we need help…"

"Anything, Dean what do you need?"

"We have to get out of town and we haven't got any money… We ditched the credit cards a while back so the police couldn't track us and now I've got one up my ass… We need somewhere to go…"

Bobby nodded, "I'll come down there and help you get Sam up to my place, where are you?"

Dean described his location and Bobby assured he'd by nightfall since he wasn't far.

"All right Dean, then I'll see you later," Bobby said about to hang up the phone.

"Wait Bobby I need your help with one more thing."

"Yeah, Dean?"

Dean swallowed and looked to make sure no one was around, "I need you to help me kill the son of a bitch that did this to him."

- - - - -

**A/N:** Please, please review ; )


	8. Chapter 8

**Title: **Here Comes a Cold

**Chapter: **8

**Author: **T (For adult themes and language)

**Summary: **Sam goes out into a blizzard to get food after Dean and him have a fight. After Sam meets a group of guys who want to do more to him than beat him up he realizes his nightmare is only beginning. Really an excuse for hurt, confused, frozen and scared Sammy with plenty of protective Dean. Beware- adult themes.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ANYTHING that has to do with supernatural!

**A/N:** OK sorry about the wait. The whole point of this chapter was three things: to give you an idea of what Dean's feeling, to let you know what Sam is dealing with and why he wasn't acknowledging Dean and to get the boys out of the damned hospital. I hate reading hospital scenes so of course I hate writing them even though I find them a little easier than writing other scenes. I hate ending a story in a hospital so I figure the sooner I get them out of there the better.

It's like could you imagine an episode of Supernatural ending in a hospital that doesn't result in a character dying? I don't really see that and if I'm correct none have (please correct me if I'm wrong). The only one I can think of is IMTOD and I think we all know how that ended.

Hope you enjoy this chapter I might be starting a new update pretty soon because I actually fell down my stairs and cracked my tailbone (I know it's pretty funny). So I'm stuck in my bed with laptop and time to kill so I'm updating and writing like crazy.

Please enjoy!

- - - - - - -

**8**

As promised, Bobby arrived by nightfall. He asked for Sam Matthew's room and followed the nurse there, but when he reached it he found himself unable to go in. Because through the window he could see them.

Bobby Singer may not have parted with John Winchester on the best of terms. Hell, John barely parted with anyone on good terms but his boys were different. They were special.

It didn't take a genius to see the unbelievable bond forged like iron between them. Bobby saw it when they were kids and he wasn't sure but he knew John did too. He couldn't have missed that through his obsession.

Sam was kind and gentle. He had a heart of gold and saw the 'shades of gray' that most hunters believed to be nonexistent. Sam was a different kind of hunter as was Dean. Because even though Dean came off as a smart-assed jerk he wasn't one. He was like his brother. Slightly rougher around the edges but nonetheless he loved Sam more than life it's self.

The brothers loved each other more than life it's self.

Neither would ever say it. The chick flick moment was too unappealing, but they both knew it deep down in their hearts. They were all they had.

That's why even though Bobby had seen some horrible things in his life this seemed to be one of the worst. Nothing could be more heartbreaking than the condition Sam was in. The only thing that came close was the look on his brother's face.

Bobby swallowed hard, unsure if he should barge in. If he should wait, come back later. But from the sound of Dean's voice on the phone, a boy he considered somewhat of a son, he knew he needed someone right now.

The door slowly creaked open and Dean's attention shot up from his brother to the man in the doorway. A sigh of relief fell past his lips and he stood up to meet Bobby at the door. Neither knew what to do but Dean didn't move away when Bobby pulled him into a tight hug.

Dean hugged him back and relaxed as Bobby whispered, "We're gonna figure this out. Don't worry, Dean…" 

Bobby pulled out of the bear hug and held Dean by the shoulders before almost guiding him back to the chair. Bobby took a seat next to him and then got a good look at Sam.

Sam was lying on the small hospital bed that he seemed to be too big for. There was a look of sham peace on his face that both hunters new only masked the pain he was really feeling inside. There were also soft restraints tied firmly around his wrists.

"Why's he restrained?" Bobby asked.

Dean sighed, "Right before I called you he had woken up… I didn't stay with him I went to call you and he ended up hurting one of the nurses… Punched 'im or something… I asked the doctors not to put them on but a security guard said that they'd dismiss us from the hospital if he didn't wear them… I needed to keep Sam here where he's safe so I agreed. I just don't know how he'll react when he wakes up…"

They sat in silence until the older hunter finally decided to break it, "You want to tell me what happened?"

Dean shook his head and let his eyes fall from his brother and to the tan carpet beneath them. Bobby expected a return to silence when Dean's cracked voice broke it.

"We were hunting some malevolent spirit… I don't even know what happened to it, it's probably still at large," Dean laughed somewhat coldly but continued, "Me and Sam were low on money and we got into this… this incredibly stupid fight about money. I sent Sam out to get us some food even though we were in the middle of a fucking blizzard and… God… I'm such a fucking asswhole… I wouldn't let him take the car. I made him walk,"

Dean looked up at Bobby expecting to see his eye narrow or hear some kind of reprimand but when none came he coughed but started the story up again, "He was gone for at least 45 minutes and then I fucking decided to get worried. I don't know what happened exactly… All I know is that I found him in the middle of some fucking park, snow covering him completely just lying there beaten to hell. He'd been mugged by this ass whole 'Mike Spinella' and probably some of his friends I doubt the jerk could have gotten the jump on him all by himself…

"And that would seem to be enough but… But god Bobby his pants were pulled down. And I knew it… God I knew what the sick bastard did to my brother but I couldn't admit it… I _ignored_ it."

"Dean…" Bobby started but it was no use.

"No Bobby, you have to let me finish… I was able to get him to this shelter in town there was this nice lady there who helped us… But she suggested I go and get an ambulance from here, the hospital… And I left Sammy there trusting that he would be fine and when I came back… he was there."

Bobby's eyes narrowed, confused, "Who was there?" 

Dean looked down and answered, heavy with emotion, "That sick bastard who had mugged Sam before… And Sam was just lying there on the couch… naked. The bastard climbed out the window and I got a shot at his foot but he got away… Sam was so… so broken… He was shaking and crying and he tried to stab himself… God my baby brother tried to kill himself! My brother was being raped while I was getting a nice warm ride in a heated ambulance…

"And the doctors treated him they said he's going to be ok… But he wouldn't even acknowledge me when I was there. And when I touched him he freaked his blood pressure… just everything…"

Bobby wasn't sure what to say, it was just too much to swallow. The brothers didn't deserve anything that was happening to them, and it was obviously not Dean's fault no matter how he twisted the story around. Bobby just didn't know how to make him see that in a response or phrase.

"I know you're not gonna listen to me, Dean… But this is not your fault." Bobby attempted.

Dean shook his head and laughed coldly, "How did I know you were going to say that? Huh?" Dean suddenly let his head drop to rest in his hands as he rubbed his temples trying to think. He shook his head again and said a muffled, "All anyone has to say after I tell this whole story is 'Oh, Dean… Don't worry it's not your fault.' As I'm the one that needs the fucking comfort right now… Look at Sam, Bobby look at my brother!"

Dean threw his hand in the direction of Sam and said, "He's hurt and sick and some sick bastard did the _worst_ to him. It's like you always think it'll never happen to me or it'll never happen to the people I care about but it does… It did.

"And with all we do, to. After Jess died, I got him back. When we found out he was psychic I got him back. When we can't save someone I get him back. When Dad died I get him back. When all this horrible supernatural shit happens I somehow manage to get him back… But it takes something that has nothing to do with the supernatural. It takes one sick bastard to make me think he might not come back this time.

"And with all this happening all anyone has to say is, 'It's not your fault.' Well Bobby, it is my fault because I don't know how to fucking fix this."

Bobby swallowed and said, "Dean. I get it ok… But you can't fix this, not yet. Not until Sam wakes up and lets us know how he wants this fixed."

Dean slammed his fist down on the table and Bobby flinched but listened, "No, Bobby! I need to fix this now! I need to figure out how to fix this and have this entire mess fixed before my brother even wakes up and has to wonder how we're going to make it through. I need to do all of this now and I have no idea what to do…" Dean took a long pause in order to lower his voice and attempt to control his breathing. He closed his eyes before opening them and looked pleadingly into Bobby's through tear-rimmed edges, "Bobby, do you know how to fix this?"

But before Bobby had the opportunity to say a word both men suddenly heard a soft moaning noise coming from the third man in the room.

Dean was next to his brother in seconds but Bobby decided it be best to not crowd the boy and stayed in his chair.

"Sammy? Come on Sammy open those eyes from me…" Dean coaxed.

Sam's expression slowly began to change from relaxed to scared as he tried to move his arms but found he could not.

"Sammy… Sam clam down, I'm here… Dean's here don't worry, please…"

Sam's breathing became labored as he struggled to calm himself. Dean watched as Sammy's unfocused eyes slowly opened and looked up at Dean. However, instead of looked at Dean they were staring through him.

"Please…"

The strangled whisper was barely audible but the pain behind it was just too much for Dean to take. All he wanted to do was take his brother into his arms and never let go but he couldn't touch him. Dean just wanted to shake Sam and make him understand. He wanted to go back to last night in the motel room and give him the keys to the Impala. A seemingly meaningless action that would have changed _everything_ if only he hadn't been so stubborn.

"Don't…" Sam begged.

"No, no, no… it's Dean… Please it's your brother,"

Sam shook his head and fought against his restraints before saying, "Don't… Touch… Dean…"

Dean's head fell down in defeat as tears began to swim to the surface. He didn't know what to do. Sam wouldn't listen to him; Sam was impossible to talk to.

"Blindfold…" Sam whispered.

Dean lifted his head up and Bobby listened as Dean asked, "What?"

Sam trembled a little but stayed silent.

"Sam what are you talking about? What does blindfold mean?" Dean asked anxiously.

Sam swallowed back the fear he was trying so hard to suppress and said, "Take… Off… Blindfold…"

Dean's eyebrows knitted and he asked, "Sam what are you…"

Then it became clear.

His brother couldn't see him.

"Sam can you see me?" Sam said nothing, "Sam, please… Can you see me at all?"

Dean didn't need anything other than a shake of his little brother's head before he was slamming his finger into the call button.

"Hey, calm down," Bobby offered.

Dean didn't even look at Bobby, "Don't tell me to clam down, Bobby. My brother can't see me. My brother is blind, don't tell me to calm down!"

Dean quickly scanned his mind for an answer, why was Sam suddenly blind? He hadn't been blind before when Dean had left to get an ambulance. Physically he'd only gotten better after being out in the cold. Could the cold make you blind? Could suicide attempts make you blind?

Could being raped make you blind?

Dean doubted any to be true but he had no explanation. The only person he could turn to was the doctor.

And wasn't that a surprise?

The doctor and another nurse suddenly appeared in the doorway and only then did the continuous buzzing stop. They both took a second to catch their breath before Dean spoke.

"My brother can't see, tell me why he can't see!" Dean yelled, admittedly a little too loud.

Sam was horrified. All the noise was only making him more nervous and the inability to move his arms to protect himself made him feel even more vulnerable and afraid. His eyes were wide open but he could see nothing and even though he couldn't feel a blindfold around his eyes he was sure Mike had put one there. He was just to numb from the cold to feel it.

And even though the voice sounded strangely enough like Dean's he knew it couldn't be his because if it were he wouldn't be blindfolded. If Dean were in the room right now he wouldn't be tied down to a bed about to be violated once again.

If Dean was the one in the room right now he was be able to see him. Period.

"Mr. Matthews, I'm going to figure out what's going on with your brother but I need you to relax because you're making my patient's blood pressure rise. This needs to be a calm environment and if you are hindering that then I will have you removed from this room immediately. Understood?"

Dean nodded quietly and moved out of the doctor's way as she approached his brother. She checked all the machines surrounding him before she said, "Sam I'm going to have to touch you now ok? I'm going to tell you exactly what I'm doing I will not hurt you, ok?"

Sam suddenly started trembling beneath the kind doctors ministrations and soon began to say short nonsense words begging for it all to stop that only broke the hearts of everyone in the room.

The doctor sighed and said, "Sam I'm just going to check your eyes, ok?"

Her cool touch frightened Sam as he felt his eyelids being opened and he tried to squirm away but to no avail. The restraints and his weakened state stopped him from getting away.

"All done Sam, ok? All done…" The doctor had been trained not to get attached to patients and not let it affect her but the way Sam had looked while she did something as simple as check his pupils – she has never seen that before from a patient, and it made her have to reach up and brush a tear away.

"Dean could I speak with you outside?" The doctor requested. Dean quickly stood up and Bobby followed behind.

Bobby quietly shut the door behind them and the doctor asked, "Are you family?" 

Bobby nodded, "Yes ma'am I'm the boys' uncle," 

"Doc, what's wrong with my brother?" Dean asked quickly.

The woman nodded and said, "I still need to run some tests but my guess is that Sam has conversion disorder… Conversion disorder is a reaction you could say, to going through a traumatic event. It's a way the mind is able to block out what it doesn't want to see. Sam doesn't want to open his eyes and be reliving what he experienced before so for that reason his mind has shut down his ability to see."

Dean couldn't believe it. His baby brother, blind. Blind because of what that creep had done to him. He swallowed his nausea and asked, "How do we get his eyesight back, does Sam just need to want to see again?"

The doctor shook her head, "I wish it were that simple but the only way I've ever seen this disorder treated was through anti depressants and therapy-"

"Doc, I don't think there's anyway my brother is going to do therapy,"

"I know, I wasn't expecting him to… Look as a doctor I suggest Sam stay here and recuperate. We start him on anti-depressants and he begins to speak with a therapist or someone…" The doctor paused and suddenly asked, "I can tell you and your brother are close, am I right?"

Dean nodded, "I practically raised him,"

The doctor nodded, "Then as a sister and a mother I suggest I get you a prescription for anti depressants and some AMA forms…" Dean cocked his head to the side in confusion, "Look, your brother needs to heal and he's not going to able to restrained to a hospital bed in a town that isn't even home. He just needs a lot of rest and on his own timetable he needs to come to terms with what happened to him. Now I'm no therapist but that's all I can suggest. It is your decision though,"

Dean glanced at Bobby and said, "How about those forms?" 

The doctor smiled as much as a person could in a situation like this and walked away.

- - - - - - -

By the time Dean and Bobby returned to Sam's room, Sam had drifted off into a light sleep that although comforting to Dean was probably hell for Sam.

The doctor returned about ten minutes later with the forms and news that all of Sam's test results had come back negative and he did not have any sexually transmitted infections. Dean and Bobby were extremely relieved so Bobby decided to go to their room get their stuff together and dig the Impala out of the snow so they could get out of there. Dean stayed behind with Sam, filling out the forms and getting whatever they had at the hospital ready to go.

About a half an hour after Bobby left a woman appeared at the doorway.

"Dean?"

Dean turned around from Sam and saw Marie standing in the doorway. Dean stood up quickly and met her at the door. She quietly reached up and patted Dean's shoulder before pulling the younger man into a hug.

"Oh, Dean… I'm so sorry…" she whispered, genuinely.

"No, you have nothing to be sorry for. It was Mike, not you." Dean said helping her over to a chair.

She sighed and said, "I tried to explain to the police but none of them would listen to me. I told them how Mike locked me in that closet but they just said that wasn't proof that he had raped Sam. I bet you anything his father paid off the police. This wouldn't be the first time..."

Dean didn't want to say anything too harsh in front of Marie and scare her so he just said, "It's ok, as long as Sam's ok…"

She nodded and said, "I brought you boys some food… I know how awful the food in this hospital is from when I fell…" She reached down and handed a warm bag to Dean and he smiled.

"Thanks but we'll have to eat it on the road… My uncle came out to help us and we're going to be staying at his place."

Marie nodded, "How's Sam doing?"

Dean frowned, "Not so good… He's suffering from conversion disorder? I dunno he can't see something about his mind reacting to the… assault…"

Marie shook her head and said, "Oh honey, don't you worry Sam's gonna be just fine… He's a fighter I can tell… I better get out of your way, but I put my number in the bag if you need anything just call me, ok?" Dean nodded and helped her up and to the door.

"Thanks for everything… I don't know where we would have been if you hadn't helped us out, so,"

"Don't worry about it, hun… Just take care of your brother and come visit me when everything's fine, ok?"

Dean nodded and hugged the kindly woman again before she left.

Dean stood, leaning up against the closed doorway for a few minutes just trying to digest everything that's been happening when he heard stirring from behind him.

"Sam?" Dean said returning to his brother's side.

Sam gasped and opened his eyes. He blinked furiously trying desperately to see but everything stayed black.

"Please…" Sam whispered.

_Not this again._ Dean screamed in his mind before whispering, "Come on Sam, its Dean. Don't you recognize my voice?"

Sam breathed heavily as he tried to process what Dean was saying. Sam closed his eyes tightly and said, "Not…"

Dean lost his patience and suddenly said, "Sam this is me, your brother. I've taken care of you your entire life. I carried you from a fire when you were six months old. I taught you how to swim when you were five. I walked you to school on your first day of kinder garden. I drove you to school on your first day of high school. I've hunted evil sons of bitches with you ever since dad let us and I've always been there for you. Please I need you to believe this is me!"

Sam seemed to consider this as tears leaked from his eyes. He wanted to believe so badly that it was Dean talking to him but he couldn't afford to let his guard down and be wrong again. He nearly screamed when he felt a rough yet loving hand undo his restraints and even though he felt like he should be begging or punching right now he was doing neither. The hand closed around his wrist gently and pulled his hand up to a necklace dangling around his neck.

"Here feel my necklace… remember how I always wear it and never take it off? Please do you remember?" Dean didn't even let Sam respond, "Here feel my jacket… Come on it's me… Believe me,"

Dean was about to move his hand to feel his necklace again but Sam shook him loose an instead reached up hesitantly to feel his face. Sam remembered what Mike's face felt like. Mike's face was unnaturally smooth and wet with sweat but the face his fingers met was slightly scruffy and defined. It was the face of his brother, it had to be.

"Dean?" Sam asked.

Dean breathed a huge sigh of relief as tears fell and said, "Yes, Sam… It's Dean…"

Dean wanted to hold his brother so bad but when he tried to Sam tried squirming away. He knew it was Dean now, but he still didn't feel comfortable being touched that much.

"Why can't I… See?" Sam panted out, his body still weak.

"It's a reaction, Sammy, but don't worry about it, ok? I'm going to fix everything I'm just taking you along for the ride… Everything's going to be fine, I'm checking you out of the hospital and Bobby's getting our stuff together at the room so we can go stay at his house and get you well again, ok? Your body's been through a lot we just need you to get lots of rest…"

Sam tried to keep up with Dean but only caught bits and pieces, "Rest… reaction… Bobby?"

"Yeah, Sammy. Bobby came out to help us. Don't worry nothing is ever going to hurt you again, I won't let it…"

Sam nodded, relief coursing through him, slowly making him exhausted, "K… De…"

With that Sam slowly fell asleep and Dean let his head fall down onto Sam's bed and cry as he wrapped his arms around his brother getting what he needed while Sam was fast asleep.

**-TBC-**

**- - - - - - -**

**A/N: **Hope it was worth the wait! If it wasn't or it was let me know by _**reviewing**_!!

Also if anyone has any requests or ideas on what they'd like to see happen to _Mike_ please let me know!

Thanks so much for taking the time to read and thank you so much to all the people that take the time to review. You guys make my day and keep me inspired!


	9. Chapter 9

9

**Title: **Here Comes a Cold

**Author: **iS2.coheed.and.cambria

**Rating: **T (For adult themes and language)

**Chapter: **NINE

**Summary: **Sam goes out into a blizzard to get food after Dean and him have a fight. After Sam meets a group of guys who want to do more to him than beat him up he realizes his nightmare is only beginning. Really an excuse for hurt, confused, frozen and scared Sammy with plenty of protective Dean. Beware- adult themes.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own ANYTHING that has to do with supernatural!

**A/N:** Sorry it took so long! Couldn't log on for a while and then I procrastinated regrettably. I really hope you all enjoy and thank you all so much for the reviews and pms and words of encouragement, you're all the reason why I keep writing!

**9**

When Sam awoke, he felt like he had only been sleeping for minutes.

There was no way to be sure of course. He couldn't look at the clock and see the time. Hell, he didn't even know what time it was that he had fallen back to sleep. Sam didn't know a lot of things it turned out. He didn't know if touching his brother's face, or hearing his voice had only been some sort of sick dream. A dream planned by the devil himself to flood him with overwhelming joy and then rip it out from underneath him, leaving him with nothing. Nothing but a used body and a broken soul.

That's why when he awoke and felt the pressure of another body draped over him. When he felt another person on top of his body, he freaked. He just lost it.

Once he realized that he was no longer restrained to the bed he moved his hands and suddenly began thrashing wildly, trying desperately to get out from underneath this person's body – Mike's body, probably.

He pushed and squirmed and whimpered desperately. He couldn't let this happen again, not a third time.

Feeling this body on top of him suddenly brought back a flood of horrifying memories. Mike on top of him. Mike touching him. Mike licking him.

Mike inside of him. It was all too much, just too much.

But pondering more, with his mind racing from thought to thought, memory to memory he suddenly remembered that during the rape, during Mike being on top of him, while Mike was touching him he had reacted. His body had reacted to it.

It was in that moment Sam was sure everything snapped. Even more than it already had at least.

Because in that moment Sam convinced himself that he had wanted it. That he liked the atrocities Mike had committed on his body. He wanted it, he liked it and it was about to happen again.

Whining desperately and blinking as hard as he could trying to get his eyes to work properly he suddenly felt the body move off of him and barely registered hearing a thud as a body collided with the floor below them. Extricating him from the tangle of blankets and pillows he fell off the bed and onto the floor, ripping numerous IV's from his body, but he didn't care. He needed to get away before it happened again, before he wanted it again.

He faintly heard a worried voice calling his name over and over but he blocked it out, instead he scrambled to his feet, but instead of making it safely away, ran into machines and painful objects that poked into his body.

He tripped and fell over numerous items that were unrecognizable he felt his skin ripping and scraping, but he needed to get away. He needed to run. It didn't take much longer for him to trip over something and fall to the floor unceremoniously pushing the nameless machines out of his way hearing crash after crash of expensive equipment breaking. His fingers found the safety of a wall that he quickly found trust in as he traced it with his hands until he found a safe corner. Huddling himself in the corners protection he put his side into it and burrowed his face into his knees as he attempted to cover himself with his arms.

He sobbed and cried, begging for who ever was on top of him to leave and not hurt him, but soon he felt fingers smoothing at his hair and he wanted to die. It couldn't be gentle, Mike couldn't be kind. He couldn't continue whispering, "It's Dean." Over and over and "I'm not going to hurt you," like it was true.

"P-please…" he whispered as his body ached, "Don't m-make me want it…"

- - - - - - -

Dean had stayed clutching Sam long after his baby brother had drifted off to sleep. He wondered if he would ever be able to hug his brother again while he was awake, if he would ever feel Sam hug him back.

All his life he had tried desperately to avoid a pathetic chick flick moment. To avoid touching, much less hugging his one and only brother, but now he feared he would never get that again. After avoiding or even pushing it away before, now he was realizing that Sam may never want to be touched again, may never fully recover. And that was beyond dealing with.

So Dean hugged and sobbed into his brother's shoulder for countless minutes clutching and stroking and holding until his body's energy depleted and he was left a sleeping form draped over his damaged brother's body.

His sleep was so deep and dreamless. So pure and energy fulfilling that he would have wondered if it wasn't for Sam throwing him forcefully off the bed he would have ever woken up.

But he did. He did when Sam threw him to the floor and his still tired body only getting maybe a half an hour of sleep awoke with a start and to the sound off his brother crashing to the floor and sobbing hysterically.

"Sam!" he called out trying to pull himself from the floor. Soon he was on his feet and inches away from his brother, scared to touch him. Scared to try and help him.

Sam mumbled crazily whispering, "Please" and "No" and "Don't make me" over and over like some kind of dazed mantra. Dean stood behind his brother, ready to catch him if he fell in a way that could seriously hurt him but for the most part forced himself to watch as his brother crashed into machine after machine and his skin received abrasion after abrasion. He knew that touching his brother right now would not help him, but he feared in a matter of minutes he would have no choice. It wasn't until Sam fell to the floor that Dean seriously considered if he had done the wrong thing by not grabbing his brother by the hair and dragging him back to the hospital bed, but when he caught himself and slowly pulled himself to the wall he breathed a sigh of relief and followed his brother to where ever he was going.

Still whispering, "Sammy, it's me" again and again he watched as his little brother pulled himself into a tight ball in one of the corners of the room while he rocked himself back and forth mumbling heartbreakingly.

"Please, Sammy…" Dean whispered inching closer until he reached a loving hand up to smooth some of the unruly hair away from his face.

Sam looked like a wild animal. When he looked up from his knees his eyes darted back and forth trying desperately to see something, anything but only saw black. His hair was unruly and his hospital scrubs torn. His skin was red from forming bruises and some was slightly bloodied from the small cuts now covering his face, arms, legs and torso.

"It's Dean…" He paused searching his brother for some recognition, but all he received was his brother flinching away and burying his face deeper within his knees.

"Please, Sammy it's me your brother." Sam suddenly began sobbing louder now, it seemed that what Dean was say to try and calm him down was slowly making him more terrified.

"Sam, I'm not going to hurt you, I swear,"

Sam sobbed loudly as his body began to tremble beneath his brother's gentle touch before he suddenly whispered, "Please… Don't m-make me want it…"

Dean's eyebrows knitted and he whispered, "What?" 

Sam swallowed hard and said, "D-don't… Just… you c-can do it, ok? J-just… just don't…" Sam slowly started to uncurl himself and whispered, "Don't make me l-like it… Don't m-make m-me respond…" 

Dean blinked his eyes absolutely horrified because this was his worst nightmare. His brother was giving up. His brother was actually telling him to rape him, just not make him… A million horrible images and scenes he himself had never witnessed flashed before his mind as he thought about the horror of what happened to his brother.

Dean sat next to his brother – frozen – as he watched him stretch out his legs and start to pull up his hospital scrubs. Dean told his brother to stop numerous times but it was as if he couldn't hear him, especially when Sam reached over and placed his hand on his brother's upper thigh and then just a little bit higher. Suddenly, Dean unsure of what to do or say bolted from his brother's side and to the bathroom, effectively emptying the contents of his stomach, leaving a very confused Sam in the room.

He felt disgusted, not by Sam but by what he had let happen to his brother. He had allowed some pervert to twist his sense of reality and get so desperate not to be forced into something he didn't want that he'd willingly give into someone.

After Dean stopped was finished he sat on the hospital bathroom floor without any idea of what to do when he heard the door slowly creak open.

"Dean?" he heard Bobby softly call. He heard the footsteps walking down the small hallway area and into the main part of the room and then the footsteps stop. He heard him gasp and say, "Sam." And then rush over to where his brother was sitting.

"Come 'n, Sam. Let's get ya back ta bed," Bobby said softly.

Bobby knelt down next to Sam and rested a hand on his shoulder lightly. Sam flinched violently but soon relaxed into the touch of the cold calloused hand.

"Sam." Bobby said firmly, "its Bobby, kay? Let's get ya back ta bed, son."

Sam blinked his unseeing eyes and turned to face the direction the kind voice was coming from and then quietly whispered, "B-Bobby?"

Bobby nodded for no one to see and then repeated, "Yeah Sam, come 'n let's get ya back into…"

Bobby's voice died when he heard Sam start to cry softly. He wasn't sobbing like he was before, or thrashing wildly. He was just crying softly at the confusion swallowing him and the feeling of having someone there who he was sure was who they said they were. He curled himself up tightly leaning into Bobby's hand even more before he felt Bobby reach his other hand over and pull him into a loose hug. He relax and let himself cry openly as he listened to the father-figure-like man whisper, "It's ok, son. It's all ok…"

They sat there like that for a few minutes before Bobby slowly helped the broken boy to his feet and guided him in the direction of the bed. He helped him sit on it and brought over a change of clothes he had brought from the motel room.

Bobby sighed and whispered, "You think you can manage dressing yourself?"

Sam nodded silently and felt for the pile of clothing, feeling each piece of fabric in an attempt to figure out what was what.

"Ok then…" Bobby whispered, "I'll go find your brother and I'll be right-"

"No!" Sam suddenly yelled but then shrunk back mortified at his desperate tone. He sat there quietly, afraid to say anything else to the other man in the room.

"Sam, what is it?" Bobby asked genuinely concerned.

All he received in response was a small shake of the head from Sam and a barely stifled whimper.

"Sam, tell me."

The younger, broken hunter cleared his throat weakly and then whispered, "Just… D-don't leave-e… s-someone could c-come…"

Bobby stared at the young man before him looking into his eyes and seeing so much fear in them. It was taking a lot of him to trust Bobby right now, and the last thing he needed was him just suddenly leaving right after he had shown up. Sam was in a fragile state of mind at this moment and just one wrong word could send him over the edge. Bobby nodded but then remembering that Sam couldn't see him he said, "Ok, Sam. I'll stay, don't worry. I'll turn 'round 'n ya just let me know when you're done, alright?"

Sam nodded and as Bobby turned around he found a clean pair of boxers and hesitantly slid off his old ones and soon replaced then with the new ones. Even though his biggest fear about changing was over, he still didn't feel comfortable having anyone see any part of him unclothed. He felt exposed and more naked that he had ever felt before. It was a feeling like if he wasn't covered with layers of clothing or piles of blankets then something would be able to grab his shoulder or ankle or any other part of his body. A feeling he couldn't deal with right now.

Bobby stared at the opposite wall not knowing if he should say anything as a reminder that he was there or just stay quiet as not to startle the boy. He listened as he heard Sam's breathing quicken but resisted the urge to turn around. Even though he knew Sam wouldn't know, it didn't feel right to disobey his trust, even if he was trying to make sure he was ok.

"k-kay… B-bobby…" Sam whispered quietly.

Bobby turned around to see Sam had put on mostly everything correctly except for the backwards sweater. Bobby smirked a little but didn't really say anything. They'd put his jacket over it and no one would know the difference.

"Sam, do you know where your brother is?" Bobby asked but then soon regretted it.

It was as if the word brother sent Sam into automatic panic mode. Suddenly Bobby could tell that a million different fears were flying through his mind he began panting and his eyes darted from side to side and Bobby quickly sat down next to him and rubbed his back in some sort of attempt to calm him.

"Sam, what's it? Calm down now, just relax…" Bobby said soothingly.

Sam hardly relaxed and just panted out, "Where's… Dean? Don't let him… don't… lost… make… like… want…"

"Sam you're not makin' any sense, ok? Just relax and we'll figure it out… Just calm yourself down, son…"

Bobby continued to rub his back and shush him for as long as necessary until he heard his breathing calm and then soon after the strangled whisper, "Can't loose 'im Bobby… They could get 'im…"

Bobby whispered an, "I know," and soon after realizing that wasn't sufficient he whispered, "Don't worry Sam, Dean's probably just in the hallway…"

Sam shook his head back and forth and whispered, "No… No… they'll make 'im want it… They'll make 'im…" Sam was left panting, his blood pressure probably rising dangerously but he obviously didn't care. Bobby searched his face and body language for a hint that he was relaxing, but when he found none just continued trying to calm him down. He didn't know what to say and just when he was getting close to pressing the call button and asking for someone to come and look for Dean the bathroom door creaked open.

Dean emerged from the bathroom, his face damp and his eyes red probably from viciously wiping away threatening tears.

"Dean, why were ya…" Bobby started but then stopped when he saw Dean's eyes.

Dean stared directly at Sam and slowly made determined steps in his direction. Once in front of him he dropped down to his knees in front of his younger brother and watched as the young hunter shook and trembled brokenly, jerking his head from side to side occasionally as if something was reaching for it and the slight whimpering noise that Sam was making from the back of his throat could be heard but all the men in the room. Dean slowly reached up and brushed his hand alone his younger brother's hand but Sam quickly jerked it away and tried to stop himself but failed as his breathing quickened.

"Sammy, come on bro, it's Dean. I'm here for you, let me help. Trust me, please," Dean whispered.

Now Dean didn't beg. He'd face the most excruciating pain he'd give up anything of material value. He'd face death it's self. But goddamitt Dean would not beg. He just wouldn't. But then again, bring up anything having to do with Sam. Bring up Sam dying, or Sam not believing it was even _Dean_. Let any of that happen and you'll hear him beg. He'd begged his brother with everything he had. But it did nothing.

"No…" Sam whispered, "Not… B-Bobby?"

Dean glared at Bobby with fiery jealously and Bobby tried, but failed to look away. He stared directly into Dean's eyes with overwhelming regret and whispered, "Yeah, Sam. I'm here and so is your brother, He's right here next ta me…"

Dean's glaze shot back to his brother, as he seemed to debate it in his mind. Dean watched hopefully but that was automatically let down when he heard, "No… No trick… Mike stop… Please… I'll do it, I'll…"

Suddenly his breath quickened much more than it had in the last few minutes and even as the other two hunters in the room called his name and said, "Calm down, Sammy." He could not. He's breathing become more and more labored until he was sure that his throat was closing up. He couldn't calm down, he just couldn't. Not when Mike was back. Not when he was pretending to be Dean, the only person that mattered. Bobby was at least believable, how on earth would he know about him, but Dean? No, Dean was too close. Too obvious. He couldn't see. And Dean would fix that, wouldn't he? It wasn't really Dean, right?

It was too much to think about, too much to work out. It would be too easy; it would be too much like it was before the rape if Dean had actually saved him. That miracle seemed too hard to believe. Too much to consider.

And sure he remembered seeing Dean before. He remembered the feeling of his face under his fingertips and the cool wood of the pendent dangling in his hand. But it was all just a dream. Just a wonderful, safe dream.

Nothing more.

Soon he realized he was lying on the bed struggling for air as he felt hands stilling him and voices quieting him. He felt warmth spread throughout his body and then nothing as he dipped into the realm of unconsciousness.

- - - - - -

Dean didn't know what to do.

That was it. Plain and simple.

But then again, he could always ask Bobby, because he seemed to be Sam's best friend at the moment.

Bobby. A man they trusted more than anything but still had only known for a collective 150 something days in their entire lives. 100 to 150 something days – maybe. But Sam had known for at least over 8,400 days. About a hundred to 8,400. But right now, Bobby is the only person that he trusts. That he believes is him.

Because sure, they had known Bobby for practically their entire lives. He was always there to call. Always there as a wise voice in an otherwise muddy situation. But thinking about it. Over most of their lives they had only seen him maybe three times a year for a certain amount of days. Maybe adding up to a bit over 150 days out of their entire lives. Dean knew Sam everyday save four years at Stanford.

And it just wasn't fair when he contemplated it.

Sam was supposed to be able to trust Dean always. Had it been that Dean had left him? Was Sam considering it to be his fault that Mike was able to rape him? Was he still mad about Dean sending him out in the cold? Was he mad about something Dean had said the night before? Or was it something else completely?

Why? That was all he could think repeatedly.

When he heard the door open and Bobby's voice he planned to leave and meet him. But hearing Sam respond to him. Hearing Sam _trust_ someone… It would be unbelievably selfish to go and ruin it.

Dean didn't deserve Sam's trust now that he thought about it. All he deserves is to let Sam find someone to trust. And if that's not him, Sam's probably wiser than he first had imagined.

But when he hears Sam sobbing, it hurts. Like every cry is a knife to his heart – no, a thousand knifes to his heart. Every pain his brother experiences is a bullet to his head – a thousand bullets.

But Dean knows he can do nothing, and that feels like a million bullets, a million knifes.

"Please… let him find it in his heart to forgive me," Dean whispers to no one.

Dean wonders how long he'll be trapped in this bathroom, unable to help his brother. Unable to save him.

But when he thinks Bobby might leave his brother to go find him he knows he needs to go out.

So he wipes his eyes angrily, not even knowing of their existence until now. And he fixes his shirt and heads out into his brother's hospital room.

He thinks maybe Bobby says his name, or asks him some sort of question. He knows he just told himself that he can't help Sam right now and he just needs to leave him alone because Sam can't trust him. He thinks and he knows. All of this.

But one glance at his brother. One look at the trembling crying broken brother and he needs to do something. To hold his hand, smooth his hair kiss his forehead in that brotherly way. Wrap his arms around his form and squeeze him until the shaking ceases. And when he reaches the point where he's in front of him he can't stop himself as he falls to his knees and reaches for his hand, horrified that he flinches away. And when Dean begs him to trust him, begs him to understand that it's him and he just asks for Bobby, jealously washes over him.

He looks back at his brother. The person who had just begged him not to hurt him and just get it over with maybe 20 minutes ago. But he couldn't go back to that memory, not know.

Not know when his brother was suddenly hyperventilating and crying and sobbing and _not breathing_.

Dean bolted up and pushed his brother back onto the bed trying to coax air into his strained lungs, but nothing was helping. Dean quickly felt for his pulse feeling it hard and fast against his shaking fingers. Soon he realized Bobby had ran to get a doctor and now he was being pulled away.

He saw that same syringe that he had seen a few days before being lowered towards his brother's arm but unlike before he said nothing. Before he told them, "I can calm him down just let me go to him." But this time he knew that wasn't true. He couldn't calm him down this time.

- - - - - -

After the swarm of nurses and doctors had cleared and Sam was lying asleep on the hospital bed, fully clothes, face wet, and sweater backwards Dean realized an unfamiliar man was approaching him.

"Are you his brother?" the man asked.

Dean cleared his throat and answered, "Yeah, that's me."

Dean felt Bobby come up next to him but his eyes stayed trained on the man that he knew had something to say about his brother.

"Well from what I understand your brother suffered a minor panic attack…" Dean cringed, then what was a regular panic attack? The doctor cleared his throat and said, "Was your brother released already?"

Dean nodded and answered, "Yeah, he was…"

The doctor nodded and then quickly responded, "Your doctor has left and we're really short on help… a lot of people have come into the hospital with illnesses due to the blizzard and we need the room,"

Dean glared at the man just enough before saying, "We'll be gone in 10 minutes."

He said it a bit more harshly than intended and the doctor shrunk away and out the door. Even though Dean knew it was not a smart idea to take his sedated brother out of the hospital, but he didn't want to stay somewhere his brother was not wanted. And he didn't want bitter people being the ones to treat him.

"Dean…" Bobby started, but stopped quickly when Dean glared at him.

"Don't Bobby… Let's just get Sam in a wheel chair and into your car. I think he should ride with you, in case he wakes up."

Bobby blinked but said nothing, seeing the pain etched into the now silent hunter's face. Bobby just nodded and helped Dean get his unconscious brother into a wheelchair and out into Bobby's car.

Dean stood before Bobby and looked at his sleeping brother, his forehead resting against the cold glass of the window. He gave one last glance at Sam before looking at Bobby and whispering, "I'll see you there."

He turned around. Go in his car and drove away, planning to get there before Bobby and Sam. But Bobby just watched him leave shock still. He turned back to Sam seeing the sleeping boy in his car he sighed and whispered, "Boys…" and got into his car.


	10. Chapter 10

**Title: **Here Comes a Cold

**Author: **.

**Rating: **M (For adult themes and language)

**Summary: **Sam goes out into a blizzard to get food after Dean and him have a fight. After Sam meets a group of guys who want to do more to him than beat him up he realizes his nightmare is only beginning. Really an excuse for hurt, confused, frozen and scared Sammy with plenty of protective Dean. Beware- adult themes.

**Disclaimer: **Disclaimers are horribly redundant. I obviously own nothing that has to do with Supernatural and make no money off of this!

**A/N:** I literally have not updated this story in years… I recently decided I should begin writing again and I figured since this is the story the most people read it would be rude not to update it first. Thanks to all the people that continued to read this and message me after I stopped updating, you were my inspiration to start writing again… I hope you all enjoy!

Oh and here's a tiny recap since it's been so long!

The boys have just left the hospital and are on the way back to Bobby's for some major recovery. Sam is suffering from stress-induced-blindness and goes into hysterics anytime he hears his brothers' name or his brother tries to talk to him.

**10**

After hours of mindless steering and second-nature navigation Bobby allowed himself to look back at the soundless Winchester curled in the back seat of his truck.

The younger brother was pale and weak but at least he was sleeping. He trembled ever so slightly, but Bobby knew it had nothing to do with temperature. No, Sam shook at all times due to fear that consumed him - even in rest.

Bobby had attempted to catch up with Dean for maybe the first hour of the long drive back to Sioux Falls, South Dakota. He billowed around corners, sped uncomfortably above the limit and slammed the breaks on un-crossable reds. But he gave up – if Dean didn't want to be found he wasn't going to be. The older hunter couldn't help but quietly question his motives. What was to be achieved by getting as far away from his brother as possible?

Sam's near-life-less body lolled in the back seat with every bump and turn. The drivers' eyes remained dangerously fixed on the figure in his mirror, forcing him to pull over angrily. Perhaps propping up the boy in the backseat was a foolish decision.

Bobby, now very aware that he was transporting a fragile passenger, inched the car into a slow park before throwing his door open. He opened the next door gently, wary that Sam would topple out. All he found was a pasty and delicate man, head slouched to his right disagreeably. His arms hung loose at his sides, upturned and useless. All that held him from falling over in his slumber was an insecure seatbelt.

Carefully Bobby took gentle hold of the boy's shoulder before giving it a heedful shake.

Sam's unseeing eyes immediately opened. Human touch seemed to strike at his core even when the banging of his head on a window could not. His bewildered blues wandered in their sockets, unable to grasp neither a shadow nor form.

"Who?" Sam gasped out, quickly closing an incapable hand around Bobby's wrist.

Bobby quickly shushed him, "It's Bobby, Sam. How are you feeling?" Sam's eyebrows tightened, his eyes crushed closed as if in major mental struggle and his breathing became irregular. Bobby continued, "Sam, I understand it's difficult to trust me but you're gonna haf'ta. We're going back to South Dakota to meet –"

Bobby quickly stopped short, last time the word "brother" or "Dean" had been spoken, Sam all but fell into mental collapse.

"We're going to get you better at my place…" Sam's expression remained, "Come on son, I know you recognize my voice. It's me, Bobby."

Sam's face began to relax at last. His eyes opened pointlessly and he whispered, "I can't see you."

Bobby nodded, "I know. But you're gonna get better real quick. I just need ya to work with me."

Bobby looked over the young man who then remained silent for several moments. His eyes were heavily lidded and drooping. For a split second they would quickly jerk to the left or right, as if a speck of light had caught them. But it was only to be returned to that same unsettling empty gaze – one that sickened Bobby. His arms were marred with bruises and abrasions and obviously strained from the self-defense he has been forced to attempt.

Mike had waltzed into their lives, forever changing their relationships. And although Bobby wanted nothing more than to find this scum and make him pay for what he had done, he had to contain himself.

Sam inhaled loudly and strained before asked, "What should I do?"

Bobby's face cracked into a solemn smile –because while this was progress, Bobby could sense the fear still within Sam. Was he truly trusting that this was Bobby, someone who was going to help him? Or was he acting in recognition that no matter who this is, he is stronger than him, and any attempt at resistance would only worsen his fate. Bobby pushed aside his qualms, anything was good enough for him at this point.

"You're in the backseat and I'm worried you're gonna hit ya head or somthin' so I want you to let me get ya to the passengers seat…" Bobby paused, "is that alright with you?"

Sam considered the proposition and then suddenly made to move out of the truck. Bobby steadied him and guided him to his feat, but just as he stood completely free of the car, another vehicle zoomed past. The combination of loud rattling and engine with the pick up of the wind on Sam's face startled him and he quickly recoiled backwards and whimpered. He was terrified.

"It's alright Sam, just another car. Let's get you sittin' down, hmm?"

With a hand under his elbow, Bobby led the Winchester around the front and to the passengers' side of his truck. Sam moved like a frightened animal, putting one foot in front of the other haphazardly.

Once Sam had made his miraculous way into the truck Bobby closed the door and got inside himself. With the car still running, Bobby simply slid it into drive and pressed the gas, eager to get home and get the boy he could bare to look at somewhere safe. Even though having Sam in the front was a better idea, he still swayed, his head hitting the window too often. But the worst for Bobby was the soft cries that pierced the still air of the car. As Sam tried desperately to fall into the forgiving world of sleep he vocalized his frustration. He would inch closer to the black and quiet realm of dreams but he would fall backwards, realize how pained he was and how much his mind ached from trauma. And each time he was thwarted he let out a quiet whimper, a desperate vocalization of his agony.

Once he was out maybe thirty minutes later, Bobby sighed and checked his phone to see if Dean had called. He wasn't surprised when he hadn't and it seemed to make more sense. Dean couldn't deal with seeing his brother this way and being unable to help him, so he had to drive. Drive as fast as he could away. But still in Bobby's book, that didn't make it right.

It was night by the time Bobby and Sam arrived at his place and the Impala was nowhere to be seen. Confused, Bobby checked his phone once again, this time seeing a message.

The text read, "Went to get food and supplies. Be back later."

He shook his head, of course he did.

Bobby then set about the challenge of getting Sam from the car and either on to a bed or couch so that he could rest comfortably. Bobby carefully touched Sam's shoulder as to wake him but he did not. He then whispered his name a few times before finally summoning up enough courage to say, "Sam, it's Bobby. You've got to get up."

Sam woke with a start after that and, much like before, search unseeingly for something or someone to provide some security.

"Who?" Sam whispered.

"It's Bobby, Sam." Bobby whispered, his patience waning.

Tiredly Sam whispered, "Ok, what do you need me to do?"

Bobby wasn't exactly sure why Sam was bestowing so much trust in him. Was it because he was actually harboring some feelings of resentment for his brother or was it just because he had given up. Bobby was happy to see that Sam had woken up still trusting him though and saw no reason to argue the fact, so he quickly muttered something about getting him inside. Sam nodded his head and allowed himself to be dragged out of the car, pulled up the stairs and placed on to a couch in Bobby's living room.

Once settled with blankets and a glass of water Sam whispered, "Bobby… are you sill here?"

The older man who had just been staring at the younger hunter for a few minutes nodded but then quickly said, "Yeah, I' here."

Sam seemed pleased. He relaxed a little more and said, "Do you know why I can't see?"

Bobby proceeded with caution, "You've… you've been under a lot of stress. The doctor said it had somthin' to do with all that. It shouldn't last long though."

Sam appreciated the certainty in his voice. Something about the couch and the smell of Bobby's house seemed to lull him and within a few more minutes Sam was out and in what seemed to be a nightmare-less sleep.

Dean drove as fast as he could. He took unorthodox shortcuts and made unreasonable turns because he needed, needed to get as far away from Sam as possible.

In his heart, he now believed that Sam blamed him for what had happened. It was the only way to explain the fear Sam expressed in his presence and when hearing his name. Dean had not been enough for his brother. He forced him out into the cold, heartlessly. He didn't find him quick enough and then he allowed him to be hurt again by leaving him alone and defenseless. No, Dean had not been a brother – he'd been a monster.

So he drove recklessly, inching so close to trees and poles that as he turned away from them he shivered. No pain he could cause himself would ever amount to the pain his brother was going through. And it made his blood boil.

Once he got to Bobby's he was sure he and his brother would not be joining him for a while and the prospect of sitting and waiting gave him a headache simply thinking about it. He sent a quick text and started the Impala back up.

Almost three hours and unneeded detours later, cold burgers in hand he pulled back onto Bobby's property and sure enough, there was his truck. He hesitated in the car for as long as he could before he knew he could no longer. Dean stomped up Bobby's steps and opened the front door heading directly for the kitchen where he found Bobby boiling water.

"Nice of ya to show," Bobby muttered over his shoulder, bluntly.

Dean stopped short. He was expecting a snarky remark or an inquiry into where he had been. But Dean could feel he tension in the room. Bobby was not happy with Dean.

"Yeah… I got us some burgers." Dean's eyes shot around the room, "How's Sam?"

Bobby took the pot off the heat and poured it into two mugs resting beside the 1980's stove. The pot slammed back down, empty and Bobby swiftly dropped two tea bags into the water. Once the tea had been made Bobby closed his eyes and breathed in deep. His hands found the counter edges, as he tried to relax.

"Ya should have been here when we got back, Dean." Bobby turned around and stepped closer, threateningly, "Your brother's in there and he can't see a damned thing. He needs his brother not a goddamn delivery boy."

Dean half laughed nervously, "Bobby, I thought we could use some food, sorry for trying to feed –"

Bobby took another step forward, "I know the way Sam is right now is difficult, Dean. I know seeing your brother like this is god-awful. But ya have'ta keep at his side if you expect him to get better-"

But now Dean was angry.

"Don't you tell me what I need to do. Do you think I want to leave his side? Do you think I don't want to be there with him right the fuck now? I want to more than anything, Bobby but he doesn't want me there. He's afraid of me or angry with me because this is all my fault. And he damned well knows it." Dean was now inches from Bobby, hands fisted at his sides and anger practically dripping from his features. But they softened. He turned around and ran the palm of his hand over his mouth and turned around, "You're right though. I should have been here."

Bobby shook his head and whispered, "No you're right. I understand. I'm just on edge… seeing Sam like this… he's like my son and I don't know how to act."

"We're gonna have to figure it out then."

Bobby nodded and made to respond but just as he opened his mouth a loud crash sounded from the living room.

Dean was there in seconds but stopped short horrified. Sam was face-flat on the floor, arms reaching forward desperately. He had clearly tripped over a stack of old books in a desperate attempt to get somewhere, probably because of Dean's screaming.

Bobby was there and quickly next to Sam attempting to get him up but every time he touched him he recoiled and cried out as if Bobby's hands were made of fire.

Dean desperately tried to act in someway, but all he could do is listen as he hear a broken call from his brother, "Dean?"

A/N: Thanks for reading! Hope you all had a great weekend, catch you next time (soon)!


	11. Chapter 11

**Title: **Here Comes a Cold

**Author: **.

**Rating: **M (For adult themes and language)

**Summary: **Sam goes out into a blizzard to get food after Dean and him have a fight. After Sam meets a group of guys who want to do more to him than beat him up he realizes his nightmare is only beginning. Really an excuse for hurt, confused, frozen and scared Sammy with plenty of protective Dean. Beware- adult themes.

**Disclaimer: **Disclaimers are horribly redundant. I obviously own nothing that has to do with Supernatural and make no money off of this!

**A/N:** Again I'm sorry for the horrendously slow updates. The other day I was over on SPN Story Finders and someone posted this fic in response to someone's search and mentioned that it was unfortunately a work in progress. So I felt like a jerk and decided to update! I will try my best to update in a timely manner. Just started college so a lot is going on! There won't be anything else for at least a week, finals are coming up but after that is winter break so lots of writing time!

Much love to all of you who continue to read or review this story. Here we go!

**11**

The call was not the fearful one he had heard so many times before from his pained brother. This call was one of need, of trust. Suddenly and miraculously Sam needed his brother in this moment and nothing could stop Dean from throwing himself at his brothers side.

In seconds the older Winchester was beside him hovering as close as he could without touching him. The pile of books laid pathetically around his crumbled figure like rubble after an explosion. Dean watched as his brother blinked harshly, desperate to see anything that was around him but with no success. His mind did not feel safe enough yet.

"Sammy I'm right here." Dean placed his hand dangerously close to Sam's clenched fist, "Can I help you up?"

The question hung thickly in the air until Sam spat out a, "No!"

Sam continued with his internal struggle. His limbs a mess on the floor he roughly pressed his cheek down onto the cold wooden floor and grasped at the grooves in the floor panels as if he was trying to sink into the ground, disappear or melt away. He shut his eyes tight as rivers seeped down his face and his lips quivered, trying to hold in words.

Dean wanted to look back at Bobby but knew he had no answers. Sam had just reacted to Bobby as if his touch caused agony, so clearly he was no longer the person Sam needed. Dean got up and walked around to face his brother who'd turned his face away and crouched down low beside him. He took a couple deep breaths, unsure if he was making a wise choice but then whispered, "What do you need me to do Sammy? It's me, Dean."

There was no response just more tears and heavy breathing and attempts to disappear.

"Please say something. You're safe now. Nothing bad will ever happen to you again I promise. You just need to trust me." Dean whispered, more unsure of himself than ever before. Was he helping his brother or was he just making it worse?

Sam slowly opened his unseeing eyes and whispered, " 'm all confused. My eyes aren't..." Sam motioned to his eyes with limp fingers, "doing anything."

Dean nodded and said, "I understand Sammy, but it's me. We're in Bobby's house, he's here too and you're body is healing. We just don't want you to hurt yourself more lying on the floor like this."

Sam made a sudden movement in an attempt to rise but fell back down harshly. He cried out, his healing ribs taking an unnecessary beating. He took a few calming breaths before he responded, " I want it to be y-you. But you could be lying, you could just want m-me to believe it is so I-" he cut off abruptly his breathing more rushed and his tears turning into hysterics. Dean wanted more than anything to touch his brother's shoulder to pull him into his arms and will the fear away from him but he couldn't and it killed. Dean instead resorted to the usually shushes and soothing nonsense words. Sam responded slightly and the quakes that plagued his body slowed.

The room sat still for a few minutes. Sam was clearly not capable of saying anything and Dean's constant litany of "you're safe" and "not lying Sammy" had brought the tension in the room to a comfortable level. Bobby has excused himself from the room but hung just outside hoping to give the brothers some privacy but still be available should anything go wrong. Dean stayed stubbornly at his brother's side sure now more than ever that he would not give up and he would not move until Sam felt safe around him.

"Dean?"

"Yea Sam?"

"I think it's you." Sam whispered. His words dropped out like he'd been practicing them in his head for days, hopeful that he would get to use them. He moved his hand from its seemingly glued position to the floor and reach out toward his brother.

The sigh Dean exhaled felt like someone had just punched him in the gut. The force with which his happiness came was dangerous, especially since they still had so far to go. But he let it go, because he needed to. He took his brother's hand in his and felt the inevitable flinch but then trust afterward. Dean slowly and carefully helped his brother to his feet and although he wanted nothing more than to pull him into a bear hug he resisted. Instead he led him back to his place on the couch. Sam sunk into the worn leather inhaling the comforting scent of Bobby's home – like books and gunpowder.

Sam quickly tensed though, he wrapped himself in his long arms and stared straight down at his lap, straining his eyes to see something, anything. He faintly heard Dean asking him if he could look him over and make sure he hadn't been hurt anymore. Somehow Sam nodded but it didn't register. He wanted more than anything to believe it as Dean and he had no reason not to. This person was not harming him in anyway. He sounded like Dean, the warm and kind presence felt like a brother but his brain, his brain kept on with the second guess's and the what if's.

And whenever he convinced himself he was safe, that the man who did this to him was far, far away-

"_I think you know, now shut your goddamn mouth."_

And then-

"_Your gonna like this, Sammy. You're noting gonna be able to ignore me now."_

And then it would all go to shit.

"You look ok Sammy. I'm sorry, I just wanted to be sure."

Sam wanted to see Dean's face, to know that he was safe but he was shut out, in the dark.

"Thank-" Sam quickly stopped and shuddered, a bad feeling suddenly running through him. He breathed and repeated, "Thanks."

Dean smiled and whispered "Sure." He sat with Sam until he'd fallen asleep there, neither of them saying a word to the other. Once Sam was in a world of dreams—or nightmares, Dean couldn't tell—he slipped out of the room and then outside.

Bobby watched from the window as Dean kicked and punched everything in his path before throwing himself in the dirt, tears surely falling.

For the next week not much changed. Sam now believed he was in Bobby's house with Dean but he couldn't stop feeling fear in his presence. Every time they could not avoid physical contact and the chance touch occurred Sam flinched so visibly it seemed he was trying to throw himself away from him. Dean was constantly, patiently at his side. Helping him around, ensuring he was well fed and hydrated and constantly fussing over his healing ribs and wounds. The accidental cut on Sam's cheek glared at Dean constantly, always reminding him that his brother had attempted to take his own life, and that the world Sam was in right now required a lot more fixing.

"Dean, have you thought about taking your brother to see a shrink?"

Dean stopped suddenly on his stride out of the kitchen. The coffee mug in his hand and the fourth one in that short day shook slightly so he set it down. He had enough messes to clean.

He cleared his throat and without even turning to face Bobby responded, "Sammy don't want to see anybody. And he's got me."

Bobby had been doing dishes, one of the many things he had added to a list of hobbies he'd taken up since Dean and Sam had come to stay. The repetitive washing of dishes, organizing of bookshelves, and repainting of old furniture kept him in the house, close to the boys. But it also kept him from following Dean's example and destroying anything he could in his path. The anger he felt for this situation outdid most of the anger he'd felt in his life only surpassed by the loathing he'd felt for himself after the death of his wife.

Bobby walked forward, his hand suddenly on Dean's shoulder, "Son, you know this is a lot-"

But he was stopped by his hand being slapped for away and Dean rounding on him so fast he prepared to block Dean's punch. But Dean instead spat, "It's a lot but I've got to do it, Bobby. Me. I fucked this up I finish it." His voice was low, clearly fearful that Sam would hear and wake. Sam took to sleeping all day now but Dean didn't like to question it, "Ain't no body that can talk to Sam. Ain't no body who can fix this but me."

"You're doing your best Dean but hell… We don't know what we're doing and we have to make sure we do everything for Sam that we can!" Bobby knew this conversation would go nowhere. He knew that a Winchester would never speak to a goddamned shrink but he needed to try. He needed to suggest something instead of existing in this silent world where no one did a thing. Where everyone sat in the misery of their lives. Where he washed clean dishes and painted over paint and put books that were alphabetized in chronological order.

Dean was visibly shaking. The words were few but they sent bullets through him because they exposed him. He did not know what he was doing and he didn't know how to fix his brother but he had to. Dean had to save Sam like he always had.

"Forget it." Bobby muttered, "Stop drinking so much damned coffee." And he turned back to the dishes.

After his exchange with Bobby Dean drank another cup and headed to his brother. Asleep again, his chest rose and fell steadily now and that comforted Dean. His body was well on the road to recovery. His mind was lost somewhere else.

He walked in carefully but, of course, brushed the side of a shelf just enough for some meaningless knick-knack to fall and echo with a clank.

Sam shot up immediately, the noise burning his ears. Dean was quick to his side apologizing and explaining and Sam just breathed. The in's and out's soothed with his words and in a few minutes he was muttering, " 'm fine, Dean. Fine."

They sat silent and motionless for a time, Sam hugging himself and Dean staring at him, trying to read him. Dean raised his hands to his temples and finally said, "Sammy…" he paused and waited for his brother to acknowledge him, "If you want to talk about what's going on in that head of yours, I'm here. Whenever you need, whatever you need to say. You tell me ok?"

Sam only hugged himself tighter at first. He breathed harder and rocked back and forth the proposition messing with his head.

"Sammy please," Dean urged, "Just one thing. Anything small."

Sam calmed slightly but the rocking didn't stop. He continued the movements as though he were in an ocean where the waves came and went. He liked imagining himself in a warm ocean, alone and safe forever. Where no one could get him…

"I know it's you." Sam whispered and Dean listened intently. He wouldn't say a word until his brother's words were out.

"I know it's you, but I didn't before." The rocking slowing, "I thought I was back there in that place and that I was being tricked," He hugged himself tighter and let out a dark chuckle, "and I thought it was too good to be true."

Dean wanted now more than ever for his brother to see, to be validated but his eyes remained unfocused and lax in their sockets.

"And I feel stupid, Dean. I feel dumb and confused. Right now and most of the time I know that I'm safe. But I need to remind myself that, it's something I need to remember.

"That noise before," he shook, "it reminded me of that gun shot and of a fist hitting my head and of-" Sam stopped. The words wouldn't come out.

They sat again in silence for a while before Sam whispered, "The point is all of it's jumbled right now and the only thing on repeat in my head is that night. Always."

Tears were falling in big drops from his face now but he remained expressionless, numb. The tears were merely a physical reaction but something was not reaching his heart. The pain was kept far away from there. 

"And I can see nothing else. Nothing else is real to me but what I did."

With his final words Dean's composure crumbled to nothing. All that time he listened as the painful words exited his brother's mouth although he wanted to scream to kill and torture the man who did this to his baby brother. Making him numb and fearful and lost.

What _he _did.

"What do you mean what you did?" Dean asked loudly.

Sam blinked. He moved his legs up to his chest making himself into a protected ball before whispering, "nothing,"

Sam barely got the word out before Dean repeated his question, "What do you mean what you did?" Dean asked louder, harsher.

The rocking was picking up, the hugging and the breathing and all this things Sam did now to stop himself from jumping out of his skin and hiding in a small hole. Only when Dean repeated again and again did he say, "Don't make me Dean, please."

Dean's emotions were a hurricane in his head. He quickly left his brothers side now oblivious to his hysterics and only consumed in the thought of finding Mike and killing him. And while part of his head was screaming at him, yelling with all the fervor it could muster that he was hurting his brother right now, cruelly, he could not hold back his fury.

"P-please…" Sam whimpered.

Dean was inches from him in second, his hands grasping either of his shoulders tightly and now Sam was squirming and begging horribly, but Dean didn't listen instead he yelled, "None of it was your fault Sam. What happened was not your fault. You are safe. I am fixing this, I am. I am making you better!"

Sam didn't hear he just kept whispering, "Please… please don't t-touch… please… don't yell… Dean… I need Dean… p-please get him…"

And Dean backed away looking at his hands and they felt like their were stained with blood. Bobby stood in the doorway a knowing look on his face, which he himself despised.

Dean inched to his brother, "Sammy no… Sammy I am so sorry… please stop… It's ok Sammy I just…"

But Sam was lost in his mantra, lost on a course back to the numbness of sleep. The safety of being somewhere else.

And Bobby was right. Dean had no clue what the fuck he was doing.

A/N: Thank you for reading. Any feedback is appreciated!


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